My Ex is a Spy

Chapter 1

I sat on one of the bar stools all by myself, drinking the only drink that I was limiting myself to tonight. All my friends were out on the dance floor drunker than my dad on new years eve, and sadly I had to swear to them and myself that I wouldn't get drunk and that I would be their chauffeur. So I am only having one beer and that is it, even if the whole point of coming to this bar was to celebrate my birthday, but oh well, I give in too easily.

The bartender swung over to me and looked me in the eyes. "Another drink?" He asked as he leaned his elbows on the counter, grabbing my empty glass that used to be full of beer.

"Nope, I am done for tonight," I said as nicely as I could, taking a glance back at my one friend who began to find her way over to the middle of the dance floor, slurring words to anyone who got in her way that inaudible for me to hear. "I promised my friends that I would be their chauffeur for tonight." The bartender nodded in understanding, fixing his hair before he gave a warm smile. "Just let me know if you change your mind, okay?"

I nodded and off he went to go fulfill someone else's drink request. I sighed, if only I didn't make such a promise, I could really go for another beer, maybe even a Bloody Mary, but that would have to wait till tomorrow when all I would be doing tomorrow is working at my much hated job from seven in the morning till three in the afternoon. It is tough being a cook, having so many orders flung at you and having all the other workers hate your guts for no reason. And to think I would of gotten used to it by now. Out of nowhere I felt a tap on my shoulder and when I turned around, it was no surprise when I found Claudia behind me, her long blood red nails glimmering in the LED lights that shined though the club. "Hey Claudia, what is up?" I asked, watching her blood shot eyes scan me as she swayed, unable to keep her balance.

"I came here for another drink," she said, grabbing a strand of her pitch black hair and holding it in front of her nose, staring at it with her eyes crossed. "I think I am not drunk enough."

As much as I wanted to laugh at her statement, I held it in. "Then go ask the bartender for another drink if you want to."

Claudia sighed and let go of her hair. "But he is too cute, I can't look him in the eyes or even talk to him." Her amber eyes wandered behind me and I followed them to see them rest on the bartender as he made his way to the customers who were waiting for their drinks. "Also," she added as my eyes were still on him. "I can't think of a classy drink to order so he will take an interest in me." Claudia made her way closer to me and sat down on the bar stool next to me, leaning in so that I could smell the alcohol and cigarettes in her breath. "What do I do?"

Considering that I was not a love expert, or a drink expert for that matter, I was completely lost. I mean, look at me, if I was a love expert I wouldn't be single and I would still be with my ex. But that doesn't matter at the moment because Claudia's eyes were starting to bore holes in my forehead. "Um," I said slowly, trying to quickly think of a solution. "Why don't you just order a drink you like so it expresses who you are, then you can cook up a conversation with him. That might-"

She gasped dramatically. "Brilliant! That is so smart! I- did you just come up with that?" Claudia asked as her posture was off balance as she childishly poked me in the nose. I nodded and she squealed, fixing her posture so that she seemed a little taller than she actually was and waited for the bartender to come around, ordering a Pina Colada with a sheepish grin. As she drunkenly talked to him and he talked back I decided that I had to use the bathroom and got up to go do so. I am sorry if I am not the type who likes to get smothered in others romance.

Walking casually past a gang of drunk boys, I made my way to the woman's rest room and went inside a stall, taking my phone out of my pocket so that I could sit on the closed toilet seat, not really having to go to the bathroom. Feeling the phone buzz in my hand, letting me know that I was getting a text from someone. I turned on my phone and opened my threads with all the people that I have texted ever since I had gotten this phone upgrade. The text was sent from Claudia, telling me that my advice was working so far and that she will find another way to thank me. Or at least that is what I got from her sloppy texting. I pulled my feet up onto the toilet seat in front of me and rested my chin on my knees, staring at the door of my stall as I just sat there, getting bored and knowing that I couldn't go out for another drink. Maybe next time don't give in to Alex's pleas, I thought myself with a grin. I can see Alex becoming a lawyer one day, he knows how to get his way. Another buzz came from my phone and I saw another text on my Claudia thread, but it wasn't really English, it was random letters pieced together, I laughed and turned off my phone, going back to staring at the stall door until I heard someone walk in.