I'm Not A Guy (INTERSEX || GXG)

CAPITULO 30: End Of The Beginning

Losing someone you love is like losing a part of yourself, a part you never imagined living without. It's the kind of pain that doesn't just break your heart; it shatters your entire world.

You spend your days imagining a future together, believing that no matter what, they'll be there with you until the very end.

You plan, you dream, you build a life around them. And then, in a moment, it's all taken away. The person who was supposed to be by your side for every breath, every heartbeat, is gone, leaving behind an emptiness that words can't describe.

It's a grief that settles deep into your bones, a sorrow that lingers in the silence they left behind. And no matter how hard you try to move on, a piece of you is forever lost with them.

I still remember the way Sage used to smile at me, how her eyes would light up with a spark that was unique to her. We had dreams together, you know? We talked about forever like it was something we could have. I really believed we'd make it, that we'd have that life together.

I even pictured us standing at the altar, holding hands, and saying our vows. I was so sure she was my forever, that we'd grow old together, with our love growing stronger every day.

But life...

Life has a way of ripping away the things you cherish most. Sage is gone. Just like that, she's gone.

And what kills me the most is knowing there's nothing I can do. Nothing. I can't bring her back. I can't hold her one last time. I can't tell her how much I love her, how much she meant to me. All those moments, all those dreams... they're gone with her.

It hurts. God, it hurts so much I can barely breathe. My chest feels like it's caving in, and no matter how many tears I shed, the pain doesn't lessen. It's like a hole in my heart that keeps getting bigger, swallowing up everything that made life worth living.

Our twins... they were my hope, my light in the darkness. But then, like a cruel joke, they were taken from me too. And she followed them. They left me here, alone, drowning in this sea of grief.

They all left me. And now I'm here, surrounded by memories that feel more like ghosts. I'm lost without them. I thought we'd have forever, but forever turned out to be nothing more than a fleeting moment, a cruel illusion.

I'd give anything to go back, to change the way things happened, to keep her here with me. But life doesn't work that way, does it? All I have now are memories and the ache of knowing I'll never see her smile again, never hear her laugh, never hold her close.

What do you do when your forever is taken from you?

How do you keep going when the person you thought you'd spend your last breath with is no longer there?

The truth is... I don't know. I don't know how to move forward without her. All I know is that the pain of losing her is unbearable, and the emptiness she left behind is something I'll carry with me until my last breath.

Walang oras o araw na dumadaan na hindi siya pumapasok sa isip ko. Parang isang panaginip lang lahat, isang panaginip na bangungot. Hindi parin ako makapaniwala na she's gone already. Why super dali ng lahat? super dali lang talaga ng life ng isang tao? it's true, people keep saying na hiram lang ang buhay ng isang tao and it's true nga.

Umabot na nga ako sa oras na nawawalan na ako ng faith kay God and I'm questioning him, 'WHY?' that word always running in my mind. I'm seeking for an answer bakit? hindi pa ba sapat na kinuha niya na ang dalawa kong anak na hindi man lang nasilayan ang mundo? is it not enough? dahilan bakit kailangan niya pa kunin si Sage?