Forbidden Dreams (Gwayne Hightower AU)

2

Gwayne couldn't accept it.
His struggling mind wouldn't stop tormenting him even at night.
He needed a plan. He needed to do something to get out of that nightmare.
He turned and turned on his large bed for the whole night, almost strangling himself with the blankets.
It was nauseating to think that he would be forced to share a bed with a Lannister.
He didn't want to take the wedding vows, he didn't want a ring around his finger to remind him that he was just a slave to his family, a pawn to make the Hightowers more powerful and richer.

This would kill him.
His agony should come to an end, eventually.
He imagined you coming with your basket and throwing flowers on his corpse.
That would be a good way to be buried.
He lingered on the idea of you towering him.
You could bring him back to life, and he would worship you for that.

You. A mere flower girl.
But you were free. Free like a butterfly.
Not a caged bird.
He couldn't get you out of his mind.
He tried to recall every detail about you, but the more he lingered, the more the memories faded away.
He needed to see you again, he needed to find you.
Even to just feel less hopeless.

His father called him for breakfast. A miserable moment to start the day.
After hearing his reproaches for his awful look, Otto Hightower sent his son to fetch Alicent, who was still unseen.

Gwayne loved his sister, specially after she was sold to an older man of the royalty and became mother at a too young age.
Luckily the man died and left her a widow, but she would never be the lively and funny girl she was used when she was still innocent.
Alicent had prayed for her brother not to face a similar, cruel destiny.
And yet, there he was, trapped in a hopeless union.

"Alicent?" Gwayne called, knocking on the half opened door, but one peek inside traumatised him.
Because a man had his face buried between her legs.

"Gwayne!" Alicent exclaimed scandalised, pushing her gowns down and slipping away from her lover.

Gwayne pretended to be hugely interested in the decorations of the ceiling "Father wants to see you".

His sister just walked passed him without a word.

"Gwayne" Cole called when Gwayne tried to escape as fast as he could.

He didn't want to listen, he didn't want to talk about it.
"I saw nothing" he lied, but Cole grabbed his arm to stop him and Gwayne cringed away from his touch.

"I love her, okay?" Cole said softly, but with a desperation that Gwayne could relate to.
Yet he had to keep some distance. He didn't want to smell his sister on Cole's breath.

"If it was for me, I would let you two be together" but Gwayne's opinion was meaningless in the large machine that ruled the family.

"I know" Cole sighed "So, what's wrong with you, man? You're not the same since meeting that flower girl? Have you fallen so hard and so low?".

Those words ignited anger in his blood. He had to clench his fists to stop himself from breaking his face.
"Don't be silly".

"No, you don't be silly" Cole retorted "You've never been so weird. You always have a solution for everything, you're the positive one. Now you look broken".

"I don't even know her name. And probably I'll never see her again" Gwayne wanted to cry. But he was a man and was already too humiliated to shed a tear.

"That's for the best" Cole tried to pat his shoulder but Gwayne avoided his touch "She's nothing. Just a flower. Withering away so quickly".

Gwayne shot him a murderous stare "Shut up".

"You can't really think of replacing her with a Lannister? I agree if you just want to warm your cock into her...".

Seeing red, Gwayne grabbed him and slammed him against the wall "Never dare to disrespect her like this ever again. Or you can't call me friend anymore".