The Incorrect Umbrella Academy - TUA Self-insert AU

We Only See Each Other at Weddings and Funerals, Pt. 1

Rye - Fei (Luther Replacement)
Wynter - Diego
Lexi - Allison
Tal - Klaus
Makayla - Five
Jasper - Ben
Robin - Jayme (Viktor Replacement)

On the 12th hour of the first day of October 1989, 43 women around the world gave birth. This was unusual only in the fact that none of these women had been pregnant when the day first began. Sir Reginald Hargreeves, eccentric billionaire and adventurer, resolved to locate and adopt as many of the children as possible.
HE GOT SEVEN OF THEM.

The Moon

An alarm sounded. Number 1 groaned and sat up to turn it off. The clock read '23:28'. They got up, and turned on all their machines and watered their plant. They began getting dressed in their space suit and headed out of their moon station to start their day. Number 1 had the name of Rye.

A House Being Burglarized

A man was thrown against the wall by a burglar. "Show me where the safe is or your family's dead!" The burglar yelled. "Just leave us alone!" The man yelled while being dragged around by the back of his shirt. In the closed doorway you could see a dark figure looking through the door. Soon enough, the figure was inside the house. He grabbed one of the burglars and snapped his neck. A cracking noise could be heard, with a thud soon following after. The figure was Number 2. He made his way around the corner and quickly began fighting off the other burglars, throwing one into a glass coffee table. He grabbed one of his knives and threw it at a burglar, slicing the thigh open. Number 2 had the name of Wynter.

A Red Carpet Event

Number 3 made her way down the red carpet, stopping right in the middle to give photographers and paparazzi a chance to take photos. She was wearing a strapless maroon ballgown, and her neck was adorned with a diamond necklace. She was beautiful, and the public definitely knew it. She posed gracefully, smiling sophisticatedly at all the cameras. Her name was being yelled all throughout the paparazzi, trying desperately to get her attention. Things like, "Over here, Over here!","There's our sweetheart!", and "Oh, you're perfect!" were thrown out. Number 3 had the name of Lexi.

A Rehabilitation Institute

Number 4 jumped off the top bunk of a bunk bed, sighing gleefully once she landed. "Hey, you, stay strong. I believe in you, okay?" She spoke enthusiastically, pointing her finger at one of the other residents. She then turned to another as she walked towards the check-out counter. "You, not so much." She told them, and they both chuckled. She looked tired, and as if she were a drug addict. Hm, wonder why she's here. She made it to the counter, and the man standing there slapped down a small plastic baggy of her things they'd taken from her when she first showed up. "We'll see you soon." The man spoke, flicking a coin toward her. Her hand reached out, catching the coin between her thumb and index finger. "Stay sober!" The attendant spoke annoyedly. She brought the coin up to her lips and kissed it, letting out a hum in response to the attendants comment. Number 4 had the name of Tal.

The Moon

Rye made their way up a small hill, looking out at the deep, dark abyss of the rest of the moon. A beep could be heard from their spacesuit. "Incoming transmission." Rye flipped up the cover on their transmission reader. They read the message and their expression dropped, not that they had much of one before. They looked.. sad. Like they didn't know what to do with themself.

A Home

Wynter picked up one of his bloody blades off the floor, looking over at the family in front of him. "Your family is safe now." He spoke. He turned to the tv, hearing the indistinct voice coming from it. "We're going now live to a breaking story." The man on the news spoke. Wynter stared at the tv in disbelief, mouth slightly agape, trying to catch his breath.

A Red Carpet Event

"One more, one more!" One man from the paparazzi yelled out. A man came behind one paparazzi worker up at the front, whispering something in his ear. "Lexi! Lexi, have you heard the news? When's the last time you saw your father?" The man cried out to her. One woman in the paparazzi yelled to her, "Have you heard from your brothers?" Lexi looked on in confusion, but she tried to keep her cool. Her assistant quickly came over and pulled her away from the paparazzi as one woman yelled, "Lexi, will you wear Valentino to the funeral?"

An Alleyway

Tal looked around suspiciously, as if to make sure nobody could see her besides the man she was meeting up with. She low fived him before taking a small baggy out of his hand, holding it up and giving it a kiss. Cut to her in an ambulance, an oxygen mask on her face. They were using the defibrillator paddles on her. She quickly bolted up, her hands shaking as she took the oxygen mask off of herself and laughed. She leaned against the side of the ambulance, letting out a satisfied groan. She held up her hand and high fived the paramedic, who looked like he'd seen her too many times to count. She looked over at the tiny tv they had sitting there, sucking her teeth. "Moments ago, police reported the death of the world's most eccentric and reclusive billionaire."  The voice on the TV spoke.

A Stage

We see an unidentified young man playing the guitar, very very skillfully. He's playing an electric guitar version of  'Phantom of the Opera". Blue lights surround him, hitting his face in all the right angles. The lights come up in house, and we see that nobody is there. He's been playing to himself the whole time. He stops playing abruptly, and the lights on him go off. The unidentified young man is number 7. Number 7 had the name of Robin. Cut to him walking down the sidewalk, passing all the stores by, until he gets to the shop with all the televisions flashing 'Breaking News!' on them. He stops in front of the window. The tv has a photo of an old man dressed in a suit with a monocle, and reads, 'BREAKING NEWS: SIR REGINALD HARGREEVES IS DEAD. LATEST UPDATES TONIGHT AT 12.'

"Dad.."