My Story Of This Fucked Up World.

It's A funny story how I got here. Well I'll tell my crazy story of my life. I'm Cindy, I'm only 13 years old and my life is crazy fucked up.

I play sports petty normal for kids in my grade. But it all starts out with my family. I have a mom and dad, basic. A twin brother Colin, A big brother Josh and a big sister Becky. We are a happy family with so much love. But one bad thing leads to another.

Like on time when Colin had a big flip out when we were 8 and he got on the roof of the 3 story house and wanted to jump off. Yeah, after that we had child service come in once a week to see if my parents were crazy. Every week I said the same old thing, "Nothings wrong with my family, Colin just had a hard day at school." The child services left after about two months.

Don't forget I'm the youngest. Colin is older by a minute, and yes it does matter to him for some crazy ass reason. And because I am the youngest I get push around by my brothers for not cleaning up after dinners or leaving something behind. But it seems Becky is always there to help me, she is my role model.

But back to my life. I'm In 7th grade and it's pretty okay I guess. My friends are there all the time with me, through everything I go through. But I always feel so alone sometime you know? Like no ones there to help you when you need it. The thing is they are there, but I don't want there help.

That makes me think of the time when ALL of my closest friends ganged up on me. I had no clue why. I was so lost through it all, and being lost so easily lead to me doing fucking dumb stuff. Such as sitting in my room crying for hours to get the corage to cut my ankles and make the pain go away forever, or for the night. It's crazy how I did it. And now the fights over but I just have cuts and cuts.

So now I faced the fears of ever having my ankles to be seen for basketball. I went to the Rec Center with my friends. They knew I cut but I never showed them. I wasn't thinking when I came out with no shoes on from the locker room. My friends stared for a little, I was understanding but when one friend said, "Slicin' dicin' Cassie?" I was done I wanted to leave already I had enough.

But because we were friends for so long I forgave her over time. It wasnt easy but it was worth it. And soon after that fight i met on of the nicest guys in the world. Seffrey, but people call him Seff for short. He was the perfect guy for me i loved him with all my heart. He did so much good things to me such as got me to stop cutting. He was perfect. But i dont know what exactly happend and all we did was fight for quiet some time. Then our perfect relationship went down the pipes and went to a friendship. Its wonderful because we still talk all the time. Then a little more after that i met this guy Mack. He was so cool and he lived in ******* we got so close telling eachother anything and everything. But mack, he told people i sent him nudes. My life with friends at ****** changed. People thought i was a skank, slut, whore. But i just dont know why mack would do that to me. So another relationship down the pipes.

So as i await my future hope to be boyfriend i started to talk to a lot of guys. From M****** and P******** they were all nice, and i talked to some guys in my school just a grade up. Then one guy, lax. He changed me also he told me he loved me and i believed him. Dumb thing. Cause then a mouth went by and he said it was all a joke... Iwascrushed. Whatever so kept talking to the same people then 2 mouths go by and Lax messages me saying hes sorryand he really does love me. He pulled me like i had strings. And i liked it. He called me babe, beautiful perfect. He got me around his fingers and i dont know how. But boy. He drives me crazy. Not sure what type though, crazy in love or crazy confused. So ill have to wait and see what happends

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