The Black Widow | A Hunger Games Fanfiction

The Train

As I left the justice building, I smiled and waved flirtatiously to the cameras, which were positioned at the train station. It took all of my brain power on that walk to compartamentalise my goodbyes and put on a good face. I couldn't afford to show any weakness.

I had thought District One was fancy, but this train was something else. My eyes wandered over the intricate decorations and lavish furnishing which not even the richest people in one could afford. And on the table in the centre: food. So much food. Food I had never even seen before in my wildest imaginings. For a second, my demeanour slipped and my jaw dropped open. I turned to Jupiter, trying to cover up my slip, but he was looking at all of it in the same way.
"Soak it all kids," Gloss told them as he boarded behind them, "For at least one of you this will be that last time you are ever on this train." Was that supposed to be encouraging?
In that moment, there was nothing I wanted more than to run over to the buffet table and load up my plate with food but I knew that would just show weakness and another breach in the persona I had build for myself. Thankfully, both mentors immediately took a seat and began to help themselves to the food. I took the chance to copy them, as did Jupiter. Gloss nodded approvingly as we ate, telling us that we'd need to store food for the games, but Cashmere stopped me after the third serving, quietly warning me,
"If you're going to play the flirtatious card, the Capitol will expect a certain... look. Gain some weight, but make sure it's not too noticeable." I nodded, relinquishing the cake slice I had been about to take. I knew that she was trying to help me, but I couldn't help but feel disappointed. For all I knew, I could be dead in a week, I wanted to enjoy the life I had left.

We didn't bother discussing our strengths on the train- Cashmere and Gloss had been our mentors long before we volunteered so they already knew our preferred weapons- so instead we discussed how we thought the reapings went.
"Yours was memorable," Cashmere told me, "Something went wrong and it was slightly out of the ordinary. But that anger was out of your persona. I don't want to see it again. You recovered okay but I don't want another slip up."
"Yours was without incident Jupiter," Gloss told his tribute, "but that means you'll need to work extra hard to make yourself stand out. Let's have a look at the other reapings. If the others seem weaker, you'll be okay but if not, we'll need to figure out another angle." Jupiter nodded. I had known him long enough to tell that he was disappointed by this, but that wasn't really my problem right now.
Unfortunately for him, the two from two both looked strong. Especially the girl: she was more masculine than feminine and was the same height as her male counterpart, both standing at probably just over six feet judging from how they towered over their escort.
We skipped three and moved onto district four: the rest of our alliance. The girl wasn't too interesting. She looked more like an outlying district to be honest. I was surprised she volunteered, but it didn't bother me too much. If she was useful, she was useful, if she wasn't, we would kill her. The boy didn't volunteer, but I could tell he was going to- he was standing where the volunteers always did and was already walking when his name was called.
After we had looked over our allies, Gloss switched the TV off,
"Did anything else interesting happen?" I asked, but he shook his head, "nothing you can tell just from looking at them, just keep an eye out during training."

We went to bed after that and finally I was alone with my letter. I took it from my pocket and broke the seal. It was in my mother's elegant handwriting:

Dear Rose,
You know we never approved of your plan to volunteer, but it seems like it's too late to stop you now. I guess it has been too late for a while.
Coming to see you today was too painful, but I knew I would see you again. In some ways, I think I believed that coming to see you was an admittal that I didn't think you were coming home. So take the lack of my presence as a vote of confidence on my part.
Your father doesn't believe I should write this letter. He thinks that if you want to die for this, then he won't stop you but he won't support you either. He said to remind you of  the story he used to tell you when you were little although he wouldn't tell me what it was about. But you'll know, I'm sure.
I can't help but feel like some of this is my fault. If I shouldn't have sent you to those first few classes at the Academy. Or after those I shouldn't have let you stay. Your father says that there's only so much you can do for your children and the rest is up to them but I think I have pushed you towards this. I too dreamed of volunteering as a child and I fear I may have been trying to live vicariously through you.
But when you come home, you will be a victor. My victor. But more importantly, my daughter. And you will survive this because I need you to come home.

Mum

P.s. your father said to give you this.

I sobbed as I read the letter but my mother's words brought me some comfort. I sat in silence for some time until my tears started to smudge the ink and then I put the letter in the pocket of my dress. But just then, something fell out. It was a necklace- a locket- made from gold that seemed pink in a certain light. It was shaped pretty generically; just a heart, but when I prised it open, there was a scrap of rainbow fabric. Nothing else, just that. I knew it had to be important if this was what my dad had given me as a district token so I carefully folded it back up and sealed it back in the locket.
But that wasn't the only thing my father had given me. A long time ago, he had given me a story and told me to treasure it and keep it secret. It had been just after I had enrolled in the academy and he had taken me out to the meadow just beyond Victor's Village alone one day. I remembered the day so clearly. Why couldn't I remember the story.
There was a girl. I think she was in the hunger games. I think she won. No, that wasn't right, he said she died. Or did she survive? I couldn't remember the story. Maybe it was a love story. He said it was from a ballad. So why were the Hunger Games in it?
I cursed myself for not remembering the story: clearly it was something he wanted me to have in my memory during the games. But there was nothing I could do about it now.
So I just allowed myself to slip off to sleep.