Wish Upon A Sunset

Don't Tell Me That

Emma

Two Hours After The Accident...

My feet dragged as I forced myself to walk back into the hospital room where Grace was staying, Zack following close behind. We had just completed her registration forms at the reception desk, and every second away from her felt like an eternity.

As I entered the room, the overpowering smell of antiseptic surrounded me, dragging me back to the day she was born.

I shuddered as I walked up to Grace's bed and trailed my eyes over her tiny body. Her eyes were still closed, and she looked peaceful lying there. I could almost convince myself that she was just taking a nap, like she did every afternoon.

Zack stood rigidly next to me, his jaw clenched and eyes staring straight ahead, avoiding any glance in my direction.

My heart squeezed, and my eyes stung. It took significant effort to resist doubling over from the physical pain my mind inflicted on me. How could I have let this happen? How could I have paid better attention?

I didn't know how I was even still standing. Was this what rock bottom felt like? Was this what people meant when they said they lost the will to keep going?

I reached down and gently grabbed my daughter's hand as a nurse walked in. She was new; I didn't remember her from earlier. We exchanged glances, and she smiled at me, but it didn't quite reach her eyes.

"Good evening," I said as she walked over to the opposite side of Grace's bed and began logging onto the mobile computer stationed there.

"Good evening." Her voice was professional, but lacked warmth. She didn't bother to look at me as she spoke. The sound of her fingers tapping on the keys filled the silence, along with the rhythmic beeping of Grace's heart monitor.

Zack's hand tightened into a fist at his side, the knuckles turning white as the nurse continued logging data without acknowledging us.

I wouldn't let her obvious reproach discourage me. If I could deal with Zackary's cold indifference, I could put up with anyone's.

"How is she doing? Better?" I hoped she would give me some good news. Maybe Grace opened her eyes while we were out of the room. Maybe they had gotten her to eat or laugh. God, what I wouldn't give to hear her carefree giggle again.

The nurse side-eyed me. "No. She has made no improvement in the last thirty minutes." Her words made me cringe, my whole body tightening, but she didn't notice because she still wouldn't fully face me. Her attitude differed completely from the nurse's earlier. At least they looked at me.

"Any idea when the doctor will be in so I can speak to him?"

She continued logging the recordings from the machine into the computer. "Dr. Weisenhall is on duty today. I can ask him to come in and speak with you, but I'm not sure how long that will be. He has other patients he's making rounds with."

"I understand. Whenever he has a moment, we would really appreciate it." My voice cracked a little at the end, and I cleared my throat to hide it.

The nurse glanced at me then, and for a second, I thought I saw pity in her eyes, but she looked away too fast to be sure.

"I'll let him know," was her brusque response as she turned off the computer and headed out of the room.

"Thank you." I didn't think she heard me. She left quickly, like she couldn't stand to be around me for another second. I sighed heavily, my shoulders sagging, and I pulled up the same chair from earlier.

Nobody interacted with me after that, leaving me to my own thoughts for a long time. Zack said nothing. He paced back and forth, running a hand through his hair repeatedly, a clear sign of his growing frustration and helplessness.