Wish Upon A Sunset

The Mysterious Shopper

Emma

"Excuse me."

A woman pushed a shopping cart towards the checkout line, and I skirted around her. At first, I avoided eye contact, old habits hard at work, before forcing myself to look her in the face and smile. She smiled back and kept going.

I sighed a breath of relief as I continued down the pasta aisle of the Super Mart. Over the last weekend, I had taken Logan's and Molly's words to heart. I didn't want to spend the rest of my life cowering in the corner of my apartment, always afraid to step foot into the world. That was no role model for my children. I longed to be the old Emma, the Emma I was before my disastrous marriage, before my daughter's accident, before I became the shell of the woman I was now.

Granted, it was hard to make that change. Years of being forced to be someone I wasn't had shaped me into...whoever I was today. It was difficult to feel worthy of love or friendship when the person you had trusted most in the world had treated you like dirt underneath their shoe and then threw you to the wolves.

And in a few days, I would have to see Zack again for my children's visitation day. Nerves threatened to make my stomach clench with nausea at the thought. The memory of the intense flashback from the last time I visited our-his-house still lingered, making me apprehensive about returning. They were already happening enough as it was.

I was nervous to see the kids again, too, fearful that Tristan would ignore me again.

Plus, I still had my mom to worry about. Even though she had been released from the hospital days ago, I realized I waited every day in anticipation of a phone call, telling me something had happened to her again.

So, yeah, I was trying as hard as I could to be kind to myself and not let the world break me, but, at times, it was overwhelming. It was so easy to crawl under a rock and hide, which was why I was forcing myself to come to the grocery store and pick up ingredients for an actual meal tonight. I deserved to eat more than just ramen.

Unbidden, the reminder of those instant noodles brought back memories of being with Logan yesterday and us sharing that elephant ear as he walked me back to the car. I hadn't been able to stop thinking about yesterday.

At first, I wasn't sure what to make of his blunt manner and sarcastic humor. But as the hours passed, I had found his confidence and willingness to speak his mind increasingly endearing.

Despite my initial reservations about opening up, Logan had a way of putting me at ease. Perhaps it was his own vulnerability and humor in admitting his failure at the shooting game, or the tender way he spoke about his mother. Regardless, my guard was lowering, bit by bit.

Logan didn't pry into my past transgressions, nor did he treat me with pity or disdain like so many others. To him, I was simply Emma - neither a victim nor someone to be looked down upon. His simple acceptance was...refreshing. Freeing, even.

When that rude young man began harassing me, Logan didn't hesitate to come to my defense. More than his words, it was the protective stance he took in front of me that made my pulse quicken, skipping like a stone across water. Nobody had stood up for me like that in longer than I could remember.

His offer to teach me self-defense only furthered that feeling of being...cherished. Valued. Like he genuinely cared about my wellbeing in a way that went beyond mere friendship.

I bit my lip, tamping down a smile. Was I reading too much into his actions? Or was the warmth blossoming in my chest the first tendrils of something more?

One thing was certain - the more time I spent with Logan, the more I wanted to be around him. His mere presence made me feel safe, accepted...maybe even deserving of a second chance, and I couldn't deny the growing spark of attraction toward him.