When Boys become Girls!

Single Chapter

In a world where gender roles are flipped

I hear the doorbell and hastily put down the dishes. The white towel on the fridge handle dries my hands as I head to the front door.

"Hi dear," I greet as the door opens "how was your day?"

I am handed the sling-on bag as Monica keys a message into her office group chat "It was okay," she says absentmindedly.

I head to the office room and leave her bag on the rack. When I enter the hallroom I find Monica in a chill conversation over phone. Probably one of her work colleagues. She gestures for me to get tea. I head to the kitchen and take the kettle off the stove. Elaichi tea is her favourite. I serve it a tray with baked cookies.

"I'll be off to Bangalore next Monday. We're going on a three-week workshop at HQ," says she.

My heart sinks. February 14th is our Anniversary! We met each other through this blind dating event on Valentine's Day ten years ago. We married five years hence and have been together ever since.

Monica is a Senior Command Researcher at the TATA Institute of Microbiology, working on a project that aims to perfect a method whereby a targeted individual muscle cell will stop consuming energy and cease respiration, thereby ending its life while leaving the adjacent cells unaffected. The success of this project would be a giant leap for science. This 'Cell suicide', as Monica and her colleagues call it, will have massive demand in the fields of medicine and military defence.

I, on the other hand, am a devoted househusband, "the pillar upon which I stand, without whom I wouldn't be half the woman I am today," as Monica has told in an interview. And I am the best cook in the whole world; Master Chefs would be put to shame.

"Now, now," Monica reaches out "I'll be back mid-way. I haven't forgotten our Anniversary," her lips firmly grip mine for a moment and then let go as she takes the tray and sips her tea.

My eyes well up. I'm touched by her consideration. I didn't think that she would prioritize our relationship so much so that she'd break her workshop halfway for it! I wouldn't have uttered a word in protest had she not!

"Aww baby," she notices my tears "you thought I'd forget?"

I wipe my eyes and nod.

"Nah. I love you so much, you know... I would even skip the entire workshop if you asked me to."

My heart flutters with emotion and the words are out before I know it "Then skip it."

Monica stares at me wide-eyed. Then she laughs "You crack the best Kautuk."

"I'm serious Monica. I want you to skip it. Just like you said."

"Kau..." Monica comes close to me and puts her arms around "...where is this coming from?"

"You said you'd do it, didn't you? So I want you to do it..." my voice cracks as I say "... for me."

"And she did not make good on her word, did she?" Asks Dr. Siddharth. Dr. Siddharth is my therapist.

"No. She said that she didn't mean it. And she didn't come for our Anniversary. IT WAS YESTERDAY!" I breakdown.

Dr. Siddharth asks me to breathe. A few breathing exercises and kind words get me to calm down in a few moments.

"Kautuk, I want you to focus on the underlying forces, the ones that are prompting you to act in such insecure ways. We've discussed it over the months... now I want you to write it down on this piece of paper."

I stare at the blank piece of paper Dr. Siddharth slides across the table.

Dear Monica

I love you. I am sorry for behaving the way I did the other day, that was totally out of line. But talking to Dr. Sid, I came to know the underlying cause. You are a celebrated scientist, recognized instantly wherever you go. People are taken away by your knowledge and personality – the horde of admirers whom I hate so much. Whereas I, the only compliments I get are 'the tea is so good', 'your fried rice is unbelievable.' You have a dream career, discussing and deliberating such high-level stuff, travelling all over the country and meeting so many people in the process. Whereas I, am stuck within the four walls dong routine house work. Of course, I understand that all men do it. And another insecurity I have is whether you find me, a mere househusband, adequate when compared to the intellectual males you meet. I wonder if you would find them better in bed than me. Of course these are just my insecurities, and you will laugh at them... but I feel inadequate and alone. You are living in the sky and I am grovelling in the dirt, able only to look up to catch a glimpse of you. You come down occasionally to meet me and it is wonderful... but I want to fly alongside you... not like this! Anyway this is what I wanted to tell you. I love you. Sorry.

Your loving husband
Kautuk