We Don't Have To Dance (An Andy Biersack Love Story) [Completed]

Chapter 26: I'm A Hazard To Myself

Chapter 26: I'm A Hazard To Myself

Mia's POV

I woke up the next morning and stumbled over to my suitcase. I grabbed my things and went to take a shower. Once I got out of the shower, I got dressed in a pair of sweatpants and a long sleeve shirt. Andy had gotten me a ticket for his flight back home, so we had to leave for the airport in a few hours.

I ran a brush through my hair and decided to let it air dry. I put on mascara, deciding not to do any extra makeup. I went back to my room and packed up my stuff, resting my suitcase against the wall. I decided to go downstairs and see if there was anything I could make myself for breakfast. 

I got down to the kitchen and saw Andy and his parents sitting at the table, eating breakfast. Andy glanced at me and then looked down at his plate. He always smiles when he sees me. I knew last night was going to fuck everything up.

"Good morning Mia! There's a plate for you on the counter," Andy's mom said. I thanked her and grabbed the plate, walking over to the table The only open seat was next to Andy so I reluctantly sat down. Breakfast was pretty quiet luckily. Once we finished, we put our plates in the sink and headed upstairs. I went to my room and laid in the bed until we had to leave for the airport. If Andy and I were going to argue, I didn't want it to be around his parents.

When it was time to go to the airport, his parents drove us. Even though Andy hadn't said a word to me this morning, he still wouldn't let me handle my own suitcase. They dropped us off at the curb and I said a quick goodbye, Andy giving them a longer goodbye. I waited for him closer to the entrance of the airport. He shortly joined me and we checked in, handing over our bags. We made it through security and found our gate. We sat and waited for our boarding time to talk. I was amazed that Andy still had not said a single word to me.

We boarded the plane and took our seats. I had the window seat and he had the middle which meant we were going to be inches from each other for the entire flight. Great.

"Are you really going to not say anything to me for the next four hours?" I asked, finally getting tired of the silent treatment.

"I've been doing well so far, haven't I?"

"What the fuck is your problem?" I snapped.

"Oh my god, we are not going to fight on a plane," he groaned.

"You've had all day to talk to me like an adult. You've refused, so now I'm going to make you talk about this when you've got nowhere to go and nothing to do. Now what the fuck is wrong?"

"Nothing, you just made this thing between us very clear and so I'm giving you what you're asking for."

"Oh my god, Andy. Is all of this because I left?"

"I fell asleep next to you and I woke up alone. I thought last night was a sign that things are finally moving forward, but I guess I was wrong."

"Andy, we talked about this. We both aren't ready to get into relationships and we didn't want to be forced into one just because we're having a baby."

"Yes, but that was three months ago! Whatever, we'll talk about this when we land," he said, putting in his earbuds. I groaned, hitting my head against the headrest. I want a drink so bad right now but I can't even do that. This is exactly why I've been strictly casual for the last two years. Feelings are complicated and relationships are messy.

We landed and grabbed our stuff, heading off of the plane. We got our bags from baggage claim and walked to where Andy had parked his car. We got in and he drove to my apartment. He got my back out of the trunk and followed me to the door. Before I could protest, he followed me into my apartment.

"Uhm-"

"We're dealing with this now," he said, sitting on the couch. I sighed and sat next to him.

"Why does this have to be such a big deal? We had sex. We've done it before, it's not like I took your virginity. I also left the first time we had sex."

"Yeah, that seems to be a pattern for you," he mumbled.

"Oh my god, Andy."

"It's because it wasn't just sex, Mia."

"What do you mean?"

"Because I-" he cut himself off and scowled. I could tell he was deciding if he wanted to keep talking. He started blinking really fast and I was worried about what was going through this mind. He grunted and bit down on his lip. He looked at me with the most vulnerable look in his eyes and I could practically see the gears turning in his brain as he worked through what he was trying to say. "I like you Mia, I really like you. It kills me that I can't give you a kiss when I see you, that I can't show you affection. It's been so hard and it keeps getting more difficult. I've been trying to be respectful of what you want, but I'm struggling."

"Andy, I..." I said, trailing off as I shook my head.

"I know. I know you don't feel the same way, but last night was different. It wasn't just casual sex. You can't deny that."

"I can't be in a relationship."

"Why not? We both grew up in loving, 2-parent households. Do you not want that for our baby?"

"I-I don't want to date you just because we're having a baby. We'll never worked out if we're forced to be together."

"We're not being forced together, at least, that's not how I feel," he said, reaching out and placing his hand on my knee.

"I can't be in a relationship," I repeated, blinking away tears.

"But why?"

"I fucked up somehow last time. I did something that caused my ex to cheat on me. Now, I'm fat and my body is about to be ripped apart here soon. Babies are hard and they put a strain on even the healthiest of relationships. I can't go through another heartbreak Andy, I can't. I can't let myself love you and run the risk of getting my heart broken."

"I would never cheat on you, I would never break your heart, Mia."

"I can't take the risk, Andy. I won't survive it. I was in such a bad place after my breakup, it took me an entire year to return to any sense or normalcy."

"Well, I don't want to force you into anything, but I just wanted to get my feelings out in the open. Do you have any feelings towards me? Am I just wasting my time? Can there ever be a future for us beyond co-parenting?"

"I do," I admitted, thinking back to last night. He's right, that wasn't just casual sex. There was more there. "I just don't think I can balance this whole pregnancy thing and a new relationship. I just can't do it right now."

"Okay," he said and I could see the gears turning as he thought about his next words. "We'll just continue like we have been and see where it goes," he suggested.

"That sounds like a good idea," I said, nodding with a smile.

"I should be getting home," he said, standing up.

"Andy," I said and he turned around, "thank you for inviting me to Ohio, for helping me."

"Of course," he smiled, "I hope you and your dad patch things up."

"Thank you," I said, walking up to him and hugging him. He hugged me back and then we separated. I waved goodbye as he left my apartment and went down the stairs. I sat on the couch and groaned.

******************************************************************

Please leave a comment and let me know what you thought!

Comments and votes let me know you are enjoying the story! Don't be a ghost reader! <3