The Heroes of Baldur's Gate... and Me

Part 9: Full of Surprises

I am in a unrecognisable woods, the tall trunks of the trees appear eerily bone white in the darkness, which seems to stretch forever in all directions. The silence is deafening, there is no birdcalls or the sound of animals in the undergrowth, but I realise this is no normal forest.

"You are not supposed to be here." An achingly familiar voice says behind me.
I spin round and see Cullen standing before me, wearing the armor I know so well, his face pale. His whole being glows faintly as if he is bathed in moonlight.
A small sob escapes my lips as I stagger towards him, tears beginning to cloud my vision.
He opens his strong arms out and I collapse into him, sobbing uncontrollably into his broad chest.

"I have missed you so much" I whisper between sobs, clutching hold of him. "I thought I would never see you again."
"I have missed you too my love" he replies, his voice sounding echoey and far away.
I bring my face up to his, looking into his beautiful grey eyes, my hand stroking his cheek.
"Why did you leave us?" I whisper.
He only gazes at me, a sad expression on his beloved face.
"You shouldn't be here." He says again.

The tears begin to fall again as realisation sinks in.
"You're not really here are you? This isn't real is it?"
He continues to look down at me sadly. "No my love." He replies.
My heart starts to break again, like it did four years ago.
"No! No you can't leave me! Not again!" I cry, desperately clinging to him as if I can prevent him from going.

"You are strong my love, you can find a cure. You need to get home and look after our daughter." His says, then let's go of me as he begins to step back. I try to reach him, to grab hold of him again but I cannot move, I am stuck in place.

With mounting fear I realise he begins to fade as he continues to step back.
"Nooooo! Don't leave me! I need you! I can't do this without you! PLEASE!!" I scream after him, my heart breaking forever.

"Goodbye my love" his voice whispers as if far away, and as I watch he fades away into the darkness.

"NOOOO.... PLEASE!I LOVE YOU!" I fall to my knees, my arms clutched tightly around myself. I throw my head back and let out a cry from the depths of my soul, for the husband I had lost, for the father my daughter never knew, for the man I had loved.

"Tamara" a gentle voice says behind me, almost tentatively.

I turn my head slowly, and see Astarion standing behind me. His usual mask of confidence gone, a somber almost guilty expression mars his face. Unlike Cullen, he is not glowing, and seems more real, as if he is actually here.

"You're dreaming, you need to wake up." He says and crouches down beside me. He lays a hand on my shoulder, and I'm surprised when it feels solid.
I reach out and touch his arm, again surprised when he feels solid. I look up into his red eyes, seeing the whirl of emotions in them.

Suddenly fear creeps up my spine and an image of him flashes before my eyes, him leaning over a dead boar, blood dripping from his fangs. I snap my hands back and recoil away from him.

"Tamara?"

I jolt awake with a start, sitting up in my bedroll. I look around in confusion, blinking in the grey light, and I realise I am back at the surveillance spot.
The sky is overcast and grey, as if it may rain any second.

I groan as I bring my hands to my head, the throbbing almost unbearable. I realise my forehead has been bandaged and I tentatively feel the area, wincing at the swelling I can feel.
The memory of running into the tree branch and being knocked down, plays in my head.