Katherine:the hajera within ~by mariam

chapter 2

Kat's mother was incredibly strict, with no room for flexibility or leniency. While she occasionally showed kindness, it was often for reasons that only Kat and I could understand. Those rare moments of tenderness felt like a dream come true, a fleeting glimpse of a fairy tale. However, as the saying goes, every coin has two sides, and Kat's mother's strict parenting often left me intimidated, even though I never met her. The pain and fear in Kat's words spoke volumes about her mother's impact.

Despite her mother's tough exterior, Kat's nature remained remarkably pure and resilient. She had a rebellious streak, refusing to conform to societal expectations, and I admired her for it. Being a badass isn't always a bad thing; sometimes, it's necessary to stand up for oneself and defy the status quo. Kat embodied this spirit, and I appreciated her unwavering confidence and unapologetic attitude.

I've heard a great deal about Kat's mother, and it's clear that their relationship was complex and multifaceted. While Kat's mother may have been strict, Kat herself was a force to be reckoned with - a true original, unafraid to speak her mind and live life on her own terms. Kat's life experiences, though premature, had a profound impact on her personality. Having faced numerous challenges at a young age, she developed a unique blend of wit, sarcasm, and resilience.

Her sharp tongue and quick wit earned her the nickname 'Frying Pan' within our group, as she could expertly roast anyone with her clever comebacks and biting humor. But what was truly remarkable about Kat was her paradoxical nature - beneath her tough exterior lay a calm, sweet, and chilled individual who didn't let things faze her. She had a remarkable ability to remain unfazed by the world around her, yet still cared deeply about those who mattered.

Despite her tough exterior, Kat had a soft spot for those she trusted, and her dry sense of humor often caught people off guard. Her ability to think on her feet and deliver clever one-liners made her a valuable asset to our group, and her nickname 'Frying Pan' became a testament to her sharp wit and sassy attitude. Yet, beneath all the bravado, Kat was a complex and multifaceted person who had been shaped by her experiences, and her calm and collected demeanor made her a beloved friend and confidante.

Kat's story is a testament to the power of resilience and the impact of our experiences on our personalities. Despite facing challenges and strict parenting, she emerged as a confident, witty, and compassionate individual who refused to conform to societal norms. Her legacy lives on through her nickname 'Frying Pan' and the countless lives she touched with her sharp wit and sassy attitude.

My world came crashing down when I found out my ex was engaged to someone else without even telling me. I felt like I'd been punched in the gut and couldn't breathe. The news made me feel worthless, like I was nothing more than trash thrown away. I wondered if I was just a disposable thing to him, something he used and then discarded.

The pain was overwhelming, and I felt like I didn't deserve to live. But then Kat stepped in and helped me see that my ex was never good enough for me. With her support, I started to heal and move on. It took two months, but I slowly began to find myself again.

During that time, I struggled to express myself, often feeling silenced and unhappy. The hurt went deep, and it took a lot of effort to acknowledge the pain. But I did it, and I started to feel like myself again.

Recently, I saw my ex at a gathering, and it was a weird experience. I felt like I was looking at a stranger, someone who used to be important to me but now seemed like a distant memory. I remembered a Hindi phrase that summed it up perfectly: "He was standing in front of me, but he wasn't mine."

Woh mere samne khada tha, par vo mera na tha!

Seeing him again made me realize how far I'd come. I was no longer the broken person I used to be. I was stronger, wiser, and more confident. I knew I deserved better, and I was grateful for Kat's support in helping me see that.

During that difficult time, I wondered why I was even alive. But now I see that mistakes are chances to learn and grow. First love is just the beginning of our journey to find true love. It might not last, but the memories stay with us.

Thanks to Kat's guidance, I now understand that I didn't lose him - he lost me! I shouldn't be sad about it; he should be the one who's regretful. With this new way of thinking, I've decided to move on with my life. It's not easy, but I know it's the best decision for my happiness.

Some changes are hard, but they're necessary for us to move forward. I'm taking control of my life and choosing to focus on my own well-being. I'm learning to let go of the past and embrace the future with an open heart.

I'm grateful for Kat's wisdom and support during this challenging time. She helped me see that I deserve better and that I shouldn't settle for someone who doesn't appreciate me. I'm excited for this new chapter in my life and the opportunities that await me.

FOR KAT;

Kat, you're the sunshine that brightens up my day and the stars that light up my night.Your strength and resilience inspire me, Kat. You're a true warrior.Kat, you're the glue that holds our friendship together. I'm so grateful for you.Your kindness and compassion are a gift to the world, Kat. Keep shining your light.Kat, you're the fire that ignites my passion and creativity. Thank you for being my spark.Your unwavering optimism and positivity are contagious, Kat. You're a blessing to those around you.Kat, you're the safe haven where I can be myself without fear of judgment. Thank you for being my rock.Your intelligence and wit are a constant source of fascination, Kat. You're a true gem.Kat, you're the melody that fills my heart with joy and my life with purpose. Keep singing your song.Your beauty, inside and out, leaves me in awe, Kat. You're a masterpiece.If I had a chance I would love to spend decades and centuries with you.

If Kat hadn't been there for me, I'm convinced I wouldn't be alive today. Her presence has brought so much joy and light into my life. However, I must admit that I've also grown accustomed to embracing a heartless, chilled, and unbothered demeanor. I've become desensitized to the feelings of others, often prioritizing my own emotional numbness over their happiness. It's a strange confession, but I've grown to love this state of being - it's liberating to be emotionless, to not care about the emotional turmoil that once consumed me.

In this state, I feel invincible, unencumbered by the burdens of empathy or compassion. It's a double-edged sword, though - while it brings me a sense of freedom, I know it also makes me selfish and unfeeling. But for now, I'm content to exist in this emotional vacuum, where the only feelings I acknowledge are my own.

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