Messed up||k.th

3❦

Imani's POV

I can't sleep.. I've been tossing I and turning all night. Maybe I just need to smoke, but I can't Kate doesn't like it when I smoke inside so instead I decided to walk to the nearest park. Kate also doesn't like me being alone for a long period of times, so I had to be super quiet when I left the house.

I sat down on the park bench pulled out a vape and my razor blade. I sucked on the vape and held the smoke in my mouth while using the blade to cut my wrists. I started doing this about eight months ago, now the feeling doesn't faze me anymore.

"Does that not hurt?" I looked up and blew the puff of smoke out of my mouth and saw that handsome guy, Taehyung I think his name was. I shook my head slowly as I looked up at him

He seems to be everywhere I am, first the rooftop, then he could've been my boss, next at the store, and right now."oh, well it looks like it.." there was some awkward silence after that before he spoke "so what brings you out here so late at night?"

"I felt like it.." he started rubbing his thighs awkwardly before speaking again"mind if I have some" he looks down at the vape in my hand as I stare at him analyzing his face"yes..you're very handsome..." he clears his throat "thanks I could say the same about you- well you're pretty not- never mind I think you know what I meant.."

"Mhm. Are you following me around?"

"What? No.. I always come here" i can't take my eyes off of him. I don't know when the next I'll see his face again or someone just as good looking"oh.."

"I have bandages.. if you want one" I shake my head"I'll be fine" he grabbed my wrist anyway and took out some bandage wrap and wrapped it around my wrist as blood bled through it"it's not ok to hurt yourself like that.." he makes sure to wrap it tightly

Why should he care? He barely knows anything about me, except for the fact that I want to kill myself"it doesn't matter no one would care anyways.." I say quietly as I pull my hand away continuing to stare at him

"Wouldn't your sister care? Did you see how worried she was the other day when she saw you talking to me?" My sister? My sisters a bitch.. "Kate? Kate's not my sister.. my sisters gone.. Kate's my friend"

"Oh, I'm sorry is your sister also dead?.." he questioned"no.. she only cares about herself" he seemed uncomfortable.."when my parents died she took all the money for herself moved away and never came back.."there was another long period of silence

"I have to get back home, nice talking to you" he stands up and straightens his clothes"what about you?.. do you have any siblings?" I don't know why but when he got up I felt urged to make him stay

"Agh yea actually I have a sister.. but I don't like her very much.." he nods before putting his head down"why not?" He sits back down next to me and relaxes a bit And he finally looked at me. If I'm pretty why would he not look at me, I look at him because I think he's handsome

"Well, how should I say this... she's a.. whore.." wow I'd never say something that bad about my sister except saying she's a bitch"how so?"I tilt my head to the side as my eyebrows go up"well simple she sleeps with any man she's see's wants a piece of her or any guy she wants a piece of"

"Here" I old my vape flat out in my hand "oh, thanks..." I don't usually share my things my things with people especially things like this, I just don't like sharing at all, but something seems special about him.."I don't share my things with people..."

"Then you shouldn't give this to me.." he tries passing it back to me but I push his hand back"no, you can use it.. I want you to" I stare blankly at him "are you sure?" I nodded my head and watched him place his lips around my pen

"Do you like it? It's my strawberry.. my favorite flavor.." I don't know why I'm sharing that"yes, it tastes good, I usually have cotton candy" I never had the flavor before only strawberry"they make ones other than strawberry?" He nodded

"What else do you smoke " I take my vape from his hand"weed, no cigarettes they give you cancer and I would hate not having hair or not being able to breath correctly.." I nod my head and think for a second "me too I hate cigarettes" he chuckled a bit and lowered his head "that's nice to know, we have something in common"

"I also smoke weed.." I sound like I'm trying to impress him? I should stop"how longs it been since your parents died.. if you don't mind me askin that is..." my head lowers at the thought of my parents

"Six years.." my eyes start to tear up a bit"I really miss them.." tears begin falling and landing onto my hand which he notices and so he places his hand on mines"I always want to be with them, but someone always ends up stopping me.." without thinking I scotched closer to him and wrapped my arms around him

"And you're one of them. I hate living. I'm just a burden to everyone. I'm making my only friend lose money, I have no one to share my feelings with anymore and I hate it.. if my parents were here they'd listen they'd give me all of my favorite things to show me I'm loved.."

Abruptly I stand up and wipe my tears away before heading by home. As I walked I heard footsteps behind me"go away.." they said nothing"I said go away" i turned around"I'm not going away I'm not just gonna let you walk off after telling me you want to kill your self, and I know if your alone now your gonna try it. Plus what kind of man would I be to let a small pretty girl like you walk home alone?"

"Fine follow me if you want.." he shoved his hands in his pockets and gestured for me to walk "I was going to either way whether you wanted me to or not"