I love you, always | Charles Leclerc ✔

10

Since Charles knew for Jules's condition, summer was extremely difficult. Julie didn't want to go see her brother because she knew that when she actually went there, it could be the last time she ever saw him breathing. Charles had been encouraging her to go see him, afraid she wouldn't get to say goodbye and get her closure.

« Julie, tu dois aller le voir, je sais que si tu n'y vas pas tu t'en voudras toute ta vie !
"Julie, you have to go see him, I know if you don't, you're gonna regret it your whole life !"

« Mais tu comprends pas Charles ! Si j'y vais, ça sera la dernière fois à tout jamais ! Je ne reverrai jamais mon frère ! »
"But you don't understand Charles ! If I go there, it'll be the last time forever ! I'll never see my brother again !"

The tears that had been building up started to fall and Charles took Julie in his arms. Even when they have a disagreement, they'll never do anything to hurt nor yell at the other. 

« Je te propose quelque chose. Je dois partir demain pour Zandvoort pour faire ma course. Quand je rentre, le lundi 12, on va tout de suite voir Jules. Comme ça tu n'auras pas à y aller seule, je serais avec toi. »
"I have something to offer. I have to leave tomorrow for Zandvoort for my race. When I come back on monday, the 12th, we're going right away to see Jules. Like that, you won't have to go alone, I'll be with you."

Charles felt her nodding in his chest. He kissed her head and kept her in his arms, swaying a little to try and calm her down.

The next day, at the airport, Charles whispered to Julie during their hug, to be strong no matter what and that he'd be back before she knew it. When Julie got back home with Pascale and Hervé, she went to sit on the outdoor sofa, with a notebook. She tried to put into words what she wanted to say to Jules.

She thought about everything she had done with her brother since she was in diapers, from the hang outs to the year of his accident where she had accompanied him on every Grand Prix. She wanted to talk about every single memory she had with him. She thought that if by some miracle Jules could hear her, she wanted the last words he ever heard from her, to be happy ones, full of nostalgia and memories from people who loved him.

At first, she wrote down some ideas she had, before arranging them in some kind of chronological order. She stayed there until dinner time, when Pascale came to her, sitting at her right.

« Julie, ma chérie, je peux te déranger quelques minutes ? »
"Julie, darling, can I bother you for a few minutes ?"

« Oui bien sûr Pascale. »
"Yes of course Pascale."

« J'aimerais te dire quelque chose. Écoute moi attentivement s'il te plaît. »
"I'd like to tell you something. Listen to me carefully please."

Julie put her notebook and pen on the table in front of them and then she turned to face Pascale completely.

« Il y a quelques années, quand Hervé avait son cancer, la vie à la maison était très compliquée. Les garçons ne voulaient pas accepter que leur père avait une maladie mortelle qui est très difficile à être soignée. L'ambiance était très tendue, nous étions tous à fleur de peau. Quand Hervé a commencé à avoir des séances de chimiothérapie, je me suis assise avec les garçons autour d'une table, et nous avons parlé. On a parlé de leur père, des souvenirs que nous avions en commun. Ce jour-là, je leur ai dit qu'il fallait qu'ils vivent au jour le jour, de faire en sorte de ne jamais regretter d'avoir fait ou pas fait quelque chose. Je suis désolée si Charles a pu te paraître insistant sur le fait de regretter de ne pas avoir fait tes adieux à Jules, je pense qu'il a gardé ce que je lui avait dit en tête. Au début nous ne savions pas si la chimiothérapie allait marcher pour Hervé et je remercie chaque jour le ciel de m'avoir laissé mon mari ; mais je ne veux pas que Jules parte sans que tu n'aies pu dire tout ce que tu avais sur le cœur. Il faut que tu sois la plus heureuse possible et tu n'y arriveras pas sans aller voir ton frère. »
"A few years ago, when Hervé had his cancer, life at home was really difficult. The boys didn't want to accept that their dad had a deadly disease which is extremely difficult to cure. the atmosphere at home was very tense, we were all on edge. When Hervé started his chemotherapy sessions, I sat down with the boys around a table, and we talked. We talked about their father, about memories we had together. That day, I told them they had to live day by day, to make sure they will never have to regret to have done or not something. I'm so sorry if Charles appeared insistent about not regretting saying your goodbyes to Jules, I think he kept in mind what I had told him. At first, we didn't know if the chemotherapy was going to work for Hervé, and I thank the sky every day for leaving me my husband ; but I don't want Jules to go without you saying what's on your mind. You have to be the happiest you can be and you won't be able to without going to see your brother."

Julie was speechless. She didn't know that there was a time the Leclercs had almost lost hope for Hervé. Of course she knew about his cancer as Charles told her everything, but she was still surprised that Pascale had come to tell her this. She took her best friend's mother's hands in hers.

« Merci Pascale de me dire ça. J'ai déjà promis à Charles que nous irions voir Jules dès son retour de Zandvoort. J'ai écrit dans un carnet ce que je voulais lui dire et je compte bien le faire, même si je me mets à pleurer ou si ça doit prendre des heures. »
"Thank you Pascale for telling me this. I've already promised Charles that we'd go see Jules upon his return from Zandvoort. I've written in a notebook what I wanted to tell him and I intend to do it even if I start crying or if it must take hours."

Pascale smiled at her kindly, proud of her for finally accepting something that would change her life forever.

« Tu sais que je ne le dis jamais sans le croire mais je suis réellement fière de toi Julie. Tu es devenue une jeune femme incroyable, plus forte que tu ne le croies. Je suis heureuse que mon fils aime une fille comme toi, je ne connais personne qui mérite plus son amour que toi. »
"You know I never say it without meaning it, but I'm truly proud of you Julie. You became an incredible young lady, stronger than you know. I'm happy that my son loves a woman like you, I know nobody who's more deserving of his love than you."

Julie started to blush at Pascale's words.

« Oh hum Pascale, on n'est pas... ensemble tu sais. On est meilleurs amis... »
"Oh um Pascale, we're not... together you know. We're best friends..."

Pascale gave Julie a knowing look.

« Julie... Tu penses vraiment que personne dans cette maison ne se doute de ce qu'il se passe entre vous ? Même si actuellement vous êtes juste meilleurs amis, crois moi ça va changer. Même une personne aveugle pourrait voir que vous vous aimez. »
"Julie... Do you really think that nobody in this house has any idea of what's going on between you ? Even if right you are only best friends, believe me that will change. Even a blind person could see you love each other."

A head stuck out the bay window.

« C'est vrai ça ! Mettez vous ensemble et vite ! On en a tous marre de vous voir tourner autour du pot comme deux aveugles ! Maintenant venez manger, j'ai faim moi ! »
"It's true ! Get together and quickly ! We're all tired of seeing you beating around the bush like 2 blind persons. Now come eat, I'm hungry !"

Julie reddened like a tomato and quickly turned her head to the teenager, glaring at him.

« La ferme Arthur ! Occupe toi de tes affaires ! »
"Shut up Arthur ! Mind your own business !"

Pascale laughed while Arthur only stuck his tongue out.