Marmalade's Love Potion

Chapter 21 - Revelations - Part 2

Steph's face fell with hurt and confusion. Penelope marshalled her spiralling thoughts, wanting to explain, yet unsure of how. Or if she even should.

For a fleeting, uncertain moment, she considered keeping the truth to herself. After all, she hadn't even told the Sisters about that night in the woods.

But then a deep guilt took root, gnawing at her gut. Could she truly allow herself to lie by omission while Steph was standing here apologising for doing the very same?

Yet... Could she trust him with this secret of hers? Could he, would he, hurt her if he knew what darkness she was capable of? If he knew of the violent precipice she had almost fallen from only a few nights prior?

Here she was, in the home of Grimwood royalty, surrounded by Grimwood Rangers, away from the Sisters, who didn't know where she was, away from her parents, who seemed not to care... about to share a secret that would put her immutably at odds with Steph's own closest family.

Suddenly, Penelope felt extremely foolish.

She stared up into Steph's stricken face, and understood with sudden clarity exactly how he had felt during those days after he had been poisoned.

Penelope swallowed back a panicked giggle at the irony. She sighed as the last wisp of lingering resentment faded, leaving only a cold and hollow dread as she made her decision.

Whatever might come, she wanted Steph to know the truth. She wanted him to understand what it was that had so irrevocably changed her own resolutions.

"There is something I must tell you... Something happened in the woods the other night. Something that, well, changed me. I feel I owe it to tell you the truth... but I fear you will turn against me if I do."

Steph's brow knitted in concern, then offered a sad smile, his eyes alight with wry understanding.

"Penelope, I swear to you, whatever you tell me, I couldn't possibly turn against you."

Though Steph's eyes shone with sincerity, Penelope's shoulders stiffened as she looked around the room, dim and empty but for the waves of soft light rolling from the large crystal sphere.

"Penelope..." Steph's voice was low and gentle. "Penelope, I promise. Whatever it is you wish to tell me, I will not turn against you... I promise, I will never harm you..."

Penelope drew in a sharp breath and met his eyes. In them lay a deep, knowing kindness, and Penelope made the choice to trust him.

"My whole life," she began, nervously twirling the stem of her honeybelle, "I've dreamed of finding love, of finding my place, in this society." Penelope gestured to the curtain, beyond which the sound of music had quieted. "I wanted nothing more than to prove to everyone, to my parents, to all those who shunned me and—and sneered at me, that I belong here."

Penelope frowned down at her hands.

"I've read every book on etiquette that was ever given to me. I've always been so diligent in my crafts and my learning. I thought, if I could just look and act the part of princess, I'd be prepared. It would be... I would be... enough."

Penelope quirked her lip in sorrow. Steph hummed in empathy, but otherwise remained quiet as she gathered her thoughts. "I've been so naive. After all that's happened in the past few weeks... Everything feels so much bigger than myself. Bigger than I fear I'll ever be truly prepared for." Penelope deliberated for a moment. "You said you spoke with Marmalade..?"

Steph nodded, frowning at the change in topic. "She mentioned that an entourage of escort might be welcomed, though... I wasn't so sure myself." Steph smiled, shy and uncertain.