🌸Can't Let You Go🌸- A KimChay AU

Chapter 14- Memories

Kim walked into the office awkwardly.

Even after the first 2 sessions, he still hasn't gotten used to being here yet. He still struggled to get a sentence out during the last meeting.

He walked up to the receptionist and cleared his throat.

"Uh, excuse me?" He waits for her to stop typing on the computer and look at him. Once she sees his face, she gives him a big smile.

"Oh! Khun Theerapanyakul! You're back already?!" She turns her attention to him completely and hands him the sign-in clipboard. "We're so happy that you are continuing to use our services with Doctor Yok. Even a little progress is still progress!"

"Thank you, Nong Lek." He gives her a tight smile and fills out the form as she goes to inform the doctor of his arrival.

It doesn't take long for the doctor to come out and lead her to her office. He sat on the couch across from her chair that was on the other side of the coffee table in front of him.

"So how was your week Khun Kimhant?" She gives him a pleasant smile as if to guide him into a pleasant conversation. He knows that she was obviously leading but maybe this time this is what he needs to finally get the courage to open up. He's grateful to Khun for finding a doctor who they could trust and who would be on their payroll.

"Well-" He looks towards the window twiddling his thumbs. "Work was its usual routine. Negotiations with the triads, checking in on our warehouses, signing off on documents and dealings."

She jots down some quick notes before resting her hands on her lap. He wants to ask her what she is writing down this time but he would rather not have a repeat of last week's session. He barely spoke more than 8 sentences but she managed to pick him apart and point out every flaw that he had along with the intrusive thoughts he would rather not talk about.

"And what about the homework I gave you last week?" She tipped her head to the side as she gave him a look of expectancy.

"I have it." He digs out the paper from his pocket and hands it to her but she shakes her head 'no.' She quickly writes something down again before looking back at him.

"That was for you to just write down what you regret in life and what you are grateful for. Now I would like you to look over your list again with a fresh pair of eyes." She picks up her cup of water taking a drink as she waits for him to read them over.

Looking down, he slowly let his eyes flow from line-to-line.

Things I Regret:

Hurting Chay

Not killing my father earlier

Not taking Chay far away from this

Letting Ple and my father influence my decision

Not taking P'Khun's help

Not asking for help

With each line, he gets more and more depressed as he feels his chest tighten. Most of his regrets were linked to Chay. he knows that he deserves what he got but it still hurts that this is what's happening.

Things I'm Grateful For:

That Chay still loves me

That Chay didn't divorce me

That Khun hasn't disowned me

That I can learn from my mistakes