Brake check- autistic Oscar Piastri, ADHD Lando Norris

14: trip

Oscar's POV:

Lando had managed to organise a chance for Carlos and I to meet. It was at his place just before we both headed back to the U.K. after our trips away. A part of me dreaded it but a bigger part of me forgot about it, too focussed on getting back home.

As per usual, I slept a majority of the flight to Australia. But this time, I was pleasantly surprised how much of a difference the fidget toy made. Whether it was waiting in the airport or after some turbulence on the flight, fidgeting with the plastic tangle in my pocket (I wasn't quite brave enough to use it completely publicly yet) calmed me quickly and made it easier to mask by quite a significant amount.

Mum met me at the airport. She didn't normally, but this time, she was so keen to see me in person and give me a hug. Complete with a ruffle of my hair, she took one of my suitcases and walked us over to her car. She let me put my music on (an actual privilege considering I wasn't the one driving) and I showed her the tangle.

"Oh that's cool."

"Mhm, it helps, like a lot. And it fits in my pocket. I was going to order some more whilst I'm home, see if there's any others that work."

"Oh definitely!" She smiled and paused to look at me the way Mum's do. "You know, I'm so proud of you Oscar."

"Thanks Mum."

"No seriously, you've really taken this in your stride. I knew this was going to be difficult but you've been amazing."

"I thought it would be worse." I didn't tell her it had been at a different time, in a different life, "but it's just been easier than I expected. Lando has struggled, but me not so much I guess."

"That's good," she smiled and nodded, "but I uh haven't told your sisters."

"Oh."

"Sorry but I just wanted to say that before we got home. They know about the rib and they know you've been a bit stressed which has been nothing but shocking for them but I wanted you to be able to say it in your own time."

"Thanks Mum, but I can tell them when I get back. They probably already know."

"They certainly know you're very special."

"Just maybe not special needs?" I joked and Mum sighed in disappointment before joining in with my laughter.

As I expected, my sisters didn't really care. I mean, they asked if that was why I'd done some things a certain way when I was younger (there were more references to the lolly incident) but mostly they said, "okay, and?"

And it was nice. Because I knew they cared but also that it didn't change anything for us, for me. Maybe when everything did happen that first time, I should have talked to them. Not now, I can't even bring myself to breathe a word about it now. But maybe, when it was happening, I could have said something and it might have helped.

Mum made me my favourite meal and at family dinner, I used the tangle. My youngest sister gave me a funny look and with a mouthful of food asked, "why do you have that?"

Before Mum could even start to say that was not a 'kind thing to say' or whatever bullshit she would always say, I answered. "The autism. It helps me to keep my brain calm and talk to you about your school even when it's boring as hell." I gave a sarcastic smile and she giggled, looking back down at her food.

"There's a kid in my class at school who's autistic." She then said, still chewing. Mum made a complaint about eating with mouths full but she kept going, "he uses ones like that but not that one and he has ear defenders and like a special teacher."

"Yea, there's a bunch of different ones, I've still got to try a load out. And I've got ear defenders too."

"We know," my eldest sister said turning to look at me, "she doesn't," she pointed at my younger sister, "but we do," she then gestured at my middle sister who nodded, "we remember it Oscar. The screaming and crying and hitting. How Mum had to wrestle you to the floor to get pairs of socks on and we remember the pairs of ear defenders which you broke because you didn't like that you had to wear them."

"I don't even remember that." I was taken aback.

"We'll, they're right, it did happen," Mum said, leaning back in her chair and sighing. I was still shocked. "But you were a kid, you were all kids, you did kid things like cry over socks."

"But the ear defenders?"

"I got you the pair in your backpack. Do you not remember?"

"No, I found them in an old kit bag and-" But now I thought about it, I couldn't actually remember where they'd come from.

"You broke all your old pairs when a kid you were karting with started making fun of them. I bought a final pair, ones that looked less like kids ones and they went missing. I hoped it meant you'd wear them at some point but you didn't. I only knew you actually had them when I saw them in your backpack the time I came to watch after Billy's accident." So Mum had thought for years that I'd broken them too?

"Oh." I had gone off my food and put my fork down, sitting back in my chair, away from the table.

"Whether you like it or not Oscar, the people that love you the most have always known who you really are."

"Ah mum, that's so cringe!" My youngest sister groaned. I smiled and gave Mum a kiss on the cheek before excusing myself to the bathroom.

Lando's POV:

Couple days into the boys trip, I'd spent too much time in the sun, eating food that Jon would be 'annoyed' about (he wouldn't really, he knew it was good for me to have breaks) and spending time with friends. For the first time in what felt like forever (but was only actually a few weeks), things felt normal. Normal but also not.

Max didn't keep asking me how I was or if I needed anything, but when the restaurant we were eating in one night became loud and overwhelming, he quickly understood and got us back to the place we were staying in time for me to have a sensory overload in the comfort of my own room.

"You want me to stay?" I nodded, hiding under another blanket. I was slowly becoming less embarrassed of it (definitely still didn't want my other friends to know just yet) because I couldn't deny how much it was helping.

Max sat on the end of my bed and stayed there quietly. "Here when you need me." And eventually, after a bit of stimming (which I was still learning but I was trying to get away from picking my nails), I asked for a hug.

When Max was staying with me in Monaco we got into a bit of a routine. It mostly involved a morning run, time spent talking about ADHD around lunchtime and me bounding round the flat until 'bedtime' trying to get rid of excess energy. Max looked like a single Dad with a 5 year old but I was kind of accepting that it was okay to get a bit of help from him right now. I was just having my eruption moment and soon I'd be back to normal and I wouldn't need the help as much. Hopefully, just in time for Zandvoort. Yea, then I'd be totally back to normal and wouldn't have to deal with any of this. And neither would Max.

Plus, between a morning run and basically becoming a bunny rabbit 10 minutes before bed, we spent most of the day outside, being busy and swimming. And that made everything quite a lot easier for me. There was also a tonne of relaxing and eating and drinking, but sitting still wasn't exactly my idea of a good time, so even though I was on holiday, I was quite happy to be so busy.

A/n Hey! Not well at the moment so expect updates to be slow. Thanks for reading though and I hope you enjoyed.