You saved my life

Chapter 38: therapy and a problem.

KOKICHI POV:

Some days have already passed. It was weird without shuichi. Everything seemed so lonely. As I promised him I started to go to therapy and too be honest it was harsh. But it does help a little already. I just went out of the big building to see kirumi waiting for me with a smile. I walked up to her and she immediately asked how it went and I told her the truth. She listened carefully as we walked back. I liked her company as she still reminded me of my mother. Even after we arrived she still talked to me. She even made me some cookies and asked me how much I miss Shuichi. Of course I always lied about that. "I don't miss him that much." I always said and she nodded, but I think she knew that I lied. It's just that kirumi never was a person to tell on me. And I liked that fact. Even though miu, kaede and Kirumi talked to me a lot, I still felt a bit lonely..

I was sitting in my room, writing my thoughts in my diary. I never thought I'd start a diary, but it was an advice from my therapist, so I just started and it actually did help. It made me feel calmer but I didn't know what I should think of it. It ,ade me a bit vulnerable and I usually don't like this feeling but well. I sighed and closed the book and then just looked out of the window. I messaged shuichi but he didn't write back at all. It made me worry but I knew that he was probably still investigating. I mean..of course he is. In America it's like 11 am right now..while in Japan it's well..midnight. I knew I should went to sleep but I just couldn't. No matter how much I wanted to. It's so weird without him. I missed him a lot. I was not even used to miss someone so much. Well..with that I mean missing someone that much who's still alive.

But well. After some hours I managed to fall asleep, only for me having to get up again because of school. I sighed, changed my clothes and went to school. I've been writing notes for Shuichi since he left and gosh it's a lot. Like a LOT. I sighed and sat in class, listened to mister Monokumas talking, wrote notes for me and shuichi and prepared for the test. I don't know why but the teachers just randomly realized that we still have things to learn so now they give us too much homework, tests and presentations. I'm almost at my limit and with the 3 therapy sessions I now have every week it will be even more stressful. But well...as long as I keep a clear head everything will be alright. Well, atleast, that's what I thought...

But school got even more stressful and because of that the therapy sessions didn't work that well. It made me frustrated. More than a week passed and he still didn't got back. It made me worry even more since he still didn't answer my messages. I couldn't tell anyone though, cause they all think it's a normal case. And it made me sick to the stomach. I started to worry even more. "Gosh abortion why do you look so distressed?" Miu started but kaito quickly interrupted her. "Maybe cause the teachers just casually gave us all too much Damn work?!" Miu sighed and nodded. She then took out an alcohol bottle and drank from it. We all stared at her with a surprised look. Like where did she get it from?!

Miu laughed and handed me a bottle and smiled. "Believe me it helps." I looked at the bottle with a look of unease. I really didn't want to drink, but that would make me look vulnerable if I would say no. So I started drinking. And so did miu, maki and rantaro. I let the bitter taste run down my throat. It was disgusting. I felt like I had to vomit already. But I still continued. It hurted to drink it though. Reminded me of my past.

I just drank and drank and drank. I don't remember how much I drank. But miu just forced me to drink more and more. And I was too stupid to say no. I was known as someone like that after all. So I continued to force myself as well. One bottle...two bottles..three bottles..on and on. At some point as miu wanted to give my drunk self another bottle, maki even stopped her. But..I don't remember the rest.

The next day I woke up in my room. I felt shitty. And as soon as I went to the bathroom I saw how paint was on my face. I knew already it was miu so I didn't really care about that. But then I saw how she posted a video of me being drunk online..and as I saw it, it kind of made me tear up. No. It made me tear up. I knew miu liked to prank me for being an asshole..but..this was even too much for me. So I pretended to be sick so I don't have to go to school. Well I was a bit sick due the alcohol after all so it wasn't an entire lie.

I quietly took out my phone..only to see that Shuichi still hadn't answered. But I just needed him in that moment...cause I felt like a piece of shit.

And I couldn't do anything about it..

Soo that was with chapter 38.!
38..that's just sick. Really sick. Oh and I think it's good to mention that it's a different timeline. As you see in kokichis pov a week has already passed while in shuichis pov it's like 3 days.

Soo yeah! Thank you all for the reads! I never thought I'd get this much! I mean over 900?! That's sick and I thank you so much!!