Every story I create, creates me. I write to create myself.
- Octavia E. Butler
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Dear diary,
And just like that I fell apart..
They say God gives us only those battles which we can handle...
We fight according to our capabilities. ..
We get only that much pain which we can handle. ..but its way worse then what they say...
They say our eyes speak...all our pain, all the feelings and all the emotion is there in them..but why does it feel like all this is fake...because if feelings could be seen in eyes people would undrstand wouldn't they.? They would know what we feel..if not everyone atleast the closest people..
But guess what we have expected things...and there goes the saying ..never expect anything from anyone...
They say hope...but when there seems nothing as a sunshine or a ray of light in your life you cant hope and be possitive..
Everyone needs a way out...I just dont now...but maybe not all have a way out.
Life isn't just having everything. .it's about having the smallest happiness of been known to atleast someone..somewhere....sometime...!
I have heard people say that when you open up to someone about your problems your troubles you feel a great weight being lifted off your shoulders. But when you don't trust anyone what can you ? Whom do you confide in? I know these are all silly questions but dear diary you are the only one whom I can confide in with all.my secrets. I know you would never break my trust or betray me...no no it's not the trust I'm talking about with secrets I'm talking about judgement. I know that whatever it is you would never judge me. Thankyou.
-Sarah.
"That feels like real great getting all what I think here within you diary." Just as I'm finished writing what I felt today i'm being called downstairs. I don't think I have done anything wrong today then what can it be that mom is calling me for.
"Sarah can you go to the stores and get some cheese we are out of it and no ones ready to go get it. Will you please get it? We have our guests coming in two hours and just the dressing with cheese is left." My mom says.
I nod my head and pull on my jacket since it is cold out today. My mom hands me the money and I leave. The store is just a five minute walk from my home. So it doesn't take me long to reach there. It's just 7p.m
So the stores are still open here. I get in quickly and purchase the cheese.
As soon as I reach home I hear some shouting noices. I know its my brother's. They are both still fighting. This is a norm at my home. I quickly remove my jacket and head in the kitchen to give her the cheese. I put the cheese on the platform and go out in the living room. Both my brother's are still fighting.
"No. mine is the best." Jack says.
"Yeah. Then why did you eat mine. If you like yours more then you shouldn't have eaten it ." Jonah says.
Seeing me they quickly try to pull me by their side so that I would take their side in their stupid argument. Both of them are a year older then me but still act like 5 year olds. Jack is 6'2" tall with dark brown hair and blue eyes. He sure is handsome and so is Jonah. Being the twins they are they have the same hair but Jonah has chocolate brown eyes just like me. Jonah sure is tall around 6'1". They both get their looks from mom but their personality is just like my dad.
"Back to earth sahara." Jonah calls out. And that's when I realize that I zoned out.
"Hey don't call me that. By the way what are you both dummies fighting about now?" I ask raising my eyebrow.
"Dummies? Is that even a word Jo? I guess our sister dear is writing some new language of hers?" Jack says and Jonah snickers.
"Whatever. If you don't want to tell me then its fine. As it is I have my homework to be done. So if I may be excused from your pointless discussion then may I-" This time its Jack who cuts me off.
"Hey sorry. Now listen this is my ice cream and that's Jonah's. Now taste both of them and tell us which one is the best." Jack says.
"Guys seriously this time you both are fighting over a stupid topic like an ice cream flavour? " Seeing the looks the both were shooting me I quickly shut up and tasted both the flavours. I did not know which was Jonah's flavour or which was Jack's cause they both think that I wouldn't be honest and would do partiality. Seriously these guys had great trust in me. (Note the sarcasm
) well the plus point was that I could have a few bites of both the ice creams which seemed delicious. First I took the bite of chocolate one with nuts and fudge. And trust me it was just too good. Then I ate the one with vanilla. It was just plain but not bad.
Both the boys were looking at me with anxious faces to see who won the fight.
"Well the winner for this fight is..." I prolong the answer and then lift the bowl with the chocolate ice cream.
With this Jonah quickly jumps on me and lets out a warrior cry of victory. And I start laughing. Yea my brothers can be really funny. And Jack well since he lost he sulks and gets on his cranky mood.
"Yea okay now no need to shove it in my face im hungry when is the dinner gonna be done?" Jack asks.
"I don't know. Mom says we have a few guests do you know who is coming?" I ask them curiously. Mom said that we are having guests but I forgot to ask her who is coming.
"It's someone from dad's office. His colleague or someone. But there's still some time why don't we watch something till then?" Jonah asks.
We all agree and get on the sofa and watch the disney movie for a few minutes till the guests arrive and that's when the disaster of my life begins!
