Blessing | Taekook

6. Owner of Clothing Company

The days followed after my mother's death were hard on me, it could have been more harder if I didn't have a specific person my side. You must be thinking my husband umm, but no honey not him. It's not like he didn't return he did return two days later saying, "Wear something nice, we will be going out for dinner....."

Oh then I realized that there is something that couples do, 'date'. They go on date, eat good food, spend good time together and end it with sweet moments. Don't mind me, I haven't been on one from a long time so I kind of forgot, "Tell the chef don't cook for us, I will be going out with Eunwoo..... ", I told Manager Kim.

I did see something in his eyes but I didn't know it was sadness. He was there all three days, even after his duty hours. Last night we even watched a movie, it was his idea. He said, I would be a fan if I once watched his favorite action movie. Somewhere, in between I started talking about my mom and cried. But he wiped the tears of my cheeks gently, telling me that everything will be okay, "T-that's ummmm good.... Do you want my help to pick a dress? Perhaps accessories, your Grace?", he spoke in a hopeful voice or he was acting it out.

"No, manager Kim that will be fine. You should take the evening off today as well.... See you in morning..... ", I said smiling half heartedly. Not that I was excited to go on a date or something. It would be better to watch a movie and talk with him.

I saw his face fell, I was not aware why though. When there isn't the possibility of something happening, you don't even think about it or get suspicious. So, I didn't know why he seem sad, "Sure Your Grace.... H-have a good night.....", he said, bowing a bit and leaving. I sighed getting my self ready with no heart at all.

"You looked so beautiful tonight.....", I was changing out of my dress after we came back from dinner where we just ate and Eunwoo attended his calls. I was standing in my walk-in closet as he came and hugged me from behind. My body stiffened as it does when a stranger touches. He kissed on my nape. Maybe he still remembered I was his husband and he had some duties towards me as well.

I didn't know what to say. Should I feel good at the compliment? My heart didn't flutter, my skin didn't tingle and my stomach didn't feel fuzzy, "I uh-..... I am tired....", I said as I tried to get out of his hold. I didn't want to do anything.

He held on to my wrist and pulled me back as I collided with his chest, "I missed you so much Jungkook....", he said leaning in and kissing my skin again. I closed my eyes, not that I felt any sensation. I closed them because I didn't want it. I didn't want him to touch me.

"Eunwoo please, I am tired.....", I said again in a weak voice. "I will make you feel so good honey.... I will make you forget all your tiredness.....", he said.

I closed my eyes, I wanted to push him away. I didn't want to do it. What's the use when your relation is so lacking in emotions, but my body didn't do more to reject him as I was made into believing that good husband should always be there, that's how you keep a man happy. I thought maybe Eunwoo realized that I was suffering and maybe he wanted to make it right. I still hate myself for letting him do that to me.

A tear slipped the corner of my eye as Eunwoo laid besides me, leaving my body finally. As always I was unsatisfied, well at that time I didn't know how satisfaction feels like because I never tasted it. I just felt incomplete inside myself and it made me more frustrated. He was snoring the next second and I was wide awake.

I felt myself suffocating in that room and in that bed. Does a relation of marriage is just for these barely five minutes? Is that all what was remaining in my marriage. I pushed my body, to sit on the bed, I didn't even feel anything, it started and ended just like that. I secured robe around me and walked out in the garden to let some fresh air in me, maybe to cleanse my body. Or maybe my eyes searched for someone in the dark of night.