After a MI6 experiment goes horribly wrong, a new phenomenon strikes earth. The VERTIX party becomes the new shadow government. They establish CRINGE ZONE INC. a government agency set on releasing a nerve agent that can completely control people's c...
- Date of creation: 1996 - Date of event: 1990 - Publicity: False - Author: Professor Garry Putrid
SOME NAMES ARE CLASSIFIED DUE TO A CASE OF A 106
SUMMARY In 1990, three of us—Dr. Roach, Professor Putrid, and Duckman—planted two tons of TNT under the Houses of Parliament. Our goal was to assassinate the Prime Minister and incite civil unrest. We easily infiltrated the building, walking through the front entrance, and made our way into a cellar.
DESIGN AND EXECUTION To recreate the [REDACTED], we used a [REDACTED] to distribute the explosive effects. A [REDACTED] delivered the dynamite while we swiftly escaped and detonated the explosives, resulting in a massive explosion.
Prominent enemies of the VERTIX party were eliminated, including Margaret Thatcher. Tony Blair was also among those killed in the explosion.
### FILE 2: GEE PLAN
- Date of creation: 1997 - Date of event: 1997 - Publicity: Partial - Author: Sir Duckman
Global Economic Expansion Plan We invested heavily in several companies:
- Apple Inc. (30%): Currently struggling, but we expect a resurgence. - Microsoft (20%): A high-performing tech company. - Intel (25%): Future profitability remains uncertain. - IBM (10%): Extremely viable.
We anticipate that by the 2020s, the combined value of these shares will reach $6 trillion USD. With this fortune, we plan to dominate global politics by controlling shadow politicians and hiring mercenary forces to take over entire nations. It's simply a waiting game.
"Wow, that's quite the history. You wrote the first one?" Ted asked. "Yes, and now you understand your sole objective as CEO of CRINGE ZONE INC." "Can I keep reading?" "Sure kid, go ahead."
### FILE 3: OPERATION: BALD EAGLE
- Date of creation: 2018 - Date of event: 2016 - Publicity: False - Author: Dr. Roach
The takeover of the United States was once deemed impossible—films like 'Red Dawn' explore this event. Yet, we accomplished it in just six days.
In 2016, President Donald Trump was assassinated by a sniper during a rally. Our passive investments provided the means to bribe politicians, turning them into our puppets. We repeated this strategy across North America, though it failed in Canada. We then launched an invasion through a fake militant group called "The Beavers," swiftly overthrowing the Canadian government in 18 days. Survivors either fled or were executed publicly on a livestream.
In conclusion, we secured control over North America but couldn't maintain global dominance. As rebellion rose, particularly during the Mexican Civil War, we were overwhelmed by three competing cartels fighting for power. Now, our dominion is limited to the U.S., Canada, Cuba, Jamaica, and several islands in the Caribbean.
"This is... how it happened?" Ted asked. "Yes, very quickly. But remember, you can't hold power forever—" "Ooh, what's this? Cards?" Ted interrupted.
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"Those are observations on our CRINGE levels. Your task is to monitor these levels among the public. C.R.I.N.G.E works much like the slang term 'cringe.' This will help us develop a nerve agent to control politics entirely." "Can I see more?" "Fine, keep reading. Just remember, curiosity killed the cat."
Ted flipped through a stack of papers, finding photographs marked with crosses and ticks, seemingly random but extremely important. He kept reading, and reading, and reading.. then he got up to date.
"That's all?" He said. "Yes, you can see this is the optimal time for history to be made. Now get out of here and meet the team."
Ted walked out, 3 scientists in front of him.
"You are.. the head of the Cringe Zone division?" One of them said. "Yes, you?" "Oh I'm Dr. Roach, I've been working here for the last 30 years since the attack on London. Him behind me is Magnet, he's new here." "Oh, hello?" He hid behind the large frame of Dr. Roach. "Okay, get out ya shell. And Meows, she's like the chemistry nerd around here. She will be developing the nerve agent here." "Ready at your command, sir!" She shouted. "Err.. what is it with weird names around here." Ted said, he had a point.
Putrid walked out and showed them the way to the Cringe Zone, a sector very close by to the main offices. "Don't fuck up really bad and I don't care." Putrid said before hastily leaving. "Okay, Dr. Roach, you work on the selected material for the labrat. Magnet, you write down and digitalise the results and ensure each save is encrypted. Meows, you do your chemistry stuff from them results.
Ted walked over to his desk, sat down in the office chair and went on his laptop. He didn't have to do anything. He was the big boss now, he could make the world better or worse—he didn't really care, he just wanted money. This is the tale of The Cringe Zone.
