Intro.

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The scent of a lavender candle filled Hasna's bedroom as Shai laid beside her, their bodies tangled in the silk sheets.

It was well into the early morning hours, and while they should've been asleep, neither of them could rest, each awake for very different reasons.

Her head rested on his chest, her curly ringlets were splayed across him and the strawberry scent of her shampoo invaded his nostrils in the worst way.

Shai was leaving, and her sweet-smelling hair was the last thing he wanted to remember her by, because it would only make him miss her more.

Hasna's fingers traced absent circles on his skin, though his mind was miles away, despite being right there with her.

He should've been gone already.

"How long do I have you this time?" Her voice finally broke the silence.

Shai closed his eyes, the weight of her question sinking in.

"I'm leaving right now, Nana," he whispered.

Her hand stilled as she lifted her head, the hurt in her eyes clear as day.

"But... you just got here," she said, sitting up. "You disappear for weeks, then show up in the middle of the night, and now you're leaving again?"

He sat up, his legs pressing into the ground as he turned his back to her.

"I'm sorry."

Word would soon spread about the botched drug deal and the three bodies left behind in the warehouse – each one a high-ranking mercenary, courtesy of his bullets.

But none of it was supposed to happen that way.

"You keep saying that," Hasna's voice wavered, "but I don't know what's going on. You won't tell me anything." The tears started to build up as she struggled to keep her voice steady. "How is this a relationship if I never see you?"

"Because.."

"Because what?!"

"Because I'm tryna protect you," Shai snapped, instantly regretting his tone.

He sighed, running a hand over his head, his frustration palpable.

"It's dangerous, Nana. If I stay–"

"You always say that but you never tell me why it's dangerous. What are you running from?" She asked, moving across the bed towards him.

He blew out a heavy breath. "I just gotta go home for a bit..."

"....America?" Her voice cracked. "You're going back to America?"

Her Swiss accent became more pronounced when she cried, twisting her English in a way he loved.

He always loved that about her.

He always loved when her accent came out to play.

"Only for a little while," Shai said, taking her hands despite her tears. "I just needa lay low for a bit, get back some of the money I lost and then Imma send a plane for you. I swear Nana, once everything's calm again, we'll be together, girl... forever this time... I promise. But right now I have to go, and I need you to trust me."

Hasna shook her head, her lips trembling. "America's so far, Shai. And it's dangerous.. they have guns there."

"There's guns everywhere... and it's only a few hours by plane. Then you can meet my family," he promised, knowing how long she'd been asking.

It never felt fair to him... her family had embraced him, yet Hasna had never met his.

Then again, Charlotte, North Carolina, was a long way from Geneva, Switzerland.

But that was the point, wasn't it? His parents sent him to Geneva because it was far, and they wanted Shai as far as possible.

"I thought you said it wasn't safe for you in America," Hasna reminded him.

The words made his knee bounce, and to calm himself, Shai reached into his pocket and glanced at the disposable phone. 

In it was an exchange from hours ago, and he read it in an attempt to calm his nerves.

11:54 PM
+1 305 241 1772
Bottles ready when u land

11:55 PM
+41 72 462 9821
U bet not be fuckin me Ray

11:57 PM
+1 305 241 1772
Come on.. u my family
I got u Haze

Reading it did nothing to ease his unease, so he just put the phone away.

"I got a couple people that owe me some favors," he said, finally ready to collect. "I should be good.."

He'd never been more vulnerable in his life, and people loved to prey on vulnerability – hence, why his guard was sky-high.

Shai didn't know who to trust anymore, and after being gone for so long, he wasn't even sure he remembered how things worked.

Raymond was the only person he could turn to... after all, they were family.

But shit, family had screwed him over plenty times before.

When he looked to Hasna, tears were streaming down her face.

"I feel like I don't even know you anymore," she said.

He wanted to tell her everything, but the truth would break her.

"I'm still the man you fell in love with, Nana... I'm still Shai.."

"...So stay with me," she pleaded, grabbing his hand and holding it tight.

He gave her a stern look that translated to 'quit' and she sniffled and nodded.

Staying wasn't an option.

"Okay," she spoke softly.

Headlights swept through the window as his ride pulled up outside.

"...You promise you won't forget about me?" She whispered.

"I promise," Shai said as he stood, pulling on his clothes as he prepared to leave.

He leaned down, pressing a lingering kiss to her forehead.

"Don't tell nobody I was here," he murmured before giving her a look. "I mean it."

Her eyes watered again. "I won't. I swear.."

He blew out a cool breath and wiped her tears.

"Just wait on me a lil bit, baby... I promise Imma see you soon," he whispered as he kissed her lips before walking out the door.

The promises he'd left behind felt hollow, and they both knew it.

Shai climbed into the back seat of the waiting car and the door slammed shut with a finality that echoed his departure.

The driver stayed silent, the engine roared to life, and the vehicle glided onto the road.

That was precisely when reality set in. He was leaving everything familiar behind and entering uncharted waters. The world he used to know had undoubtably changed from what he remembered, and he would be stepping into it blindly.

Except, Shai didn't give a fuck about the new world or its order.

For eight long years, he'd been choking down a rage that smoldered beneath a heart encased in steel.

And now... now, he was gonna make sure everybody tasted the full, unrelenting force of his fury.

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