Explanation kills art

here we go again

Isaac's pov:

I got into really heated argument with my mom, because I'm doing very badly at school and she found some cigarettes in my room that i apparently stole from her. She could care less about me smoking she is more angry about the fact that she couldn't find hers yesterday i didn't gave her mine.

And now I'm sitting in bathroom floor with a razor in my hand letting the blood pour down down my finger tips and on the floor. I just wish i didn't existed in first place i have committed 2 suicide attempts but you can see it didn't really worked out. After the second one they sended me to a mental hospital with didn't really work more the opposite it made me think that I'm fucking insane. Therapy doesn't work. Notting works. I don't understand whats keeping me alive at this point. Why don't i just end it here and now-

knocking on the door interrupted my thoughts "Are you cutting yourself again?,, i heard an irritated voice said she's probably still mad at me, even trough she doesnt have any reason to be. I could care less about answering, giving her the silent treatment really works on her. After i heard an annoyed sigh and footsteps i came out of the bathroom straight to my room. Its small bedroom with a bed,desk and closet that i can barely open whole room is decorated with posters and random graffiti that i sprayed on last year when i was grounded.

i reach to a drawer thats part of my desk and pull out a bandage, wrapped it around my arm and done. the scars sting like hell but notting i could take. Tomorrow is monday another 5 days of torture or how is it apparently called school. I lay down on my bed and instantly fall asleep.

its 5:00 my phone is playing that annoying ring tone to wake me up i have to get up this early to catch bus that comes here every hour and half because we live in some shitty old house. finally after like 7 minutes i got up and dressed up aka put some random clothes that are laying on the floor on and hope you don't look or smell homeless. I walked into bathroom. sigh the blood bled trough but I'm to lazy to change it and also I'm not wearing a long sleeve because its like 30°c and i would burd to ashes  not like i would mind that. "Everyone knows that i cut myself anyways whats the point in hiding it.,, i mumbled to myself i checked my phone 5:57 i should get going or i'll miss the bus. Headphones on ,music bursting in my ears . I'm going to be deaf in few years if i keep playing music that loud. Finally i arrived at the bus station and now just wait. Some people passing by were giving me disgusted stares but i could care less.

6:40 and I'm standing in front my middle school, I'm junior i still remember taking some test to get there and being one of the best and smartest people here just to impress my mom but she always told me i could have done better, and her being very very religious did not make it any better. I finally walked into the building and went straight to my locker to get my staff ready its 7:00 and i still have 30 minutes left. so i started to head to my first class of the day that is math, god i hate math. This time i went other way then i normally go trough just because its longer and i need to kill some time. I'm surprised that there is even some people this early.

Walking thought some hallways in the corner of my eyes i noticed 3 bigger guys standing around this smaller guy he had longer wavy light brown hair with faded blue on the ends. I stopped i quite interest in whats happening. Nothing was really happening until guy that was standing in the middle punched the blue hair in the stomach. Should i do something? I started to panic more when they started kicking him more and more. i started walking towards them "What the fuck is going on?,, i said trying to sound tough. They turned to me "none of your fucking business.,, said one of them "Then fuckoff,, they turned at me "You think that is going to be that easy?" no. I didn't say anything i didn't even had anything to say. One of the guys was about to punch me but i dodged it. Thankfully before anything worse could happen teacher came and broke it off and told me to get that guy to a nurse i wanted to help him up but soon as i touch him he said "Don't touch me, i can stand up by myself asshole ,, What the fuck did i do to him? "jeez sorry,, i said annoyed he continued "You don't need to help me to get to the nurse I'm not going there" huh "tf why?,,  i asked simply "because notting's wrong with me, talking about nurseofgice you should go there" he said when he looked at my arm i quickly put my arm behind me and look at him with annoyed face and just walk away without saying anything.I still have to get to my class.

When i got to my class i got some confused looks from my classmates. "hey dude ,, my friend dylan says when he sees me "sup dylan how are you doing?,, even thought me and dylan are friends for 3 years now we doesn't really know anything about each other. The thing that still holding us together is that we both play cs:go and other computer games together. "geaat you, what were you been doing this weekend,, cutting. "i didn't really do anything other then watching TV,, i didn't even turned on TV this weekend

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Word count: 1015

My first story ever I'm i doing good chat??

also this song is fire

(BTW i kinda put some of my experiences into this story and i also want to say sorry for my English , it isn't my first language)