My hot stepmom (Natasha Romanoff)

Chapter 20

The last three days I just layed in my bed. James checked for me all few hours but I didn't really talked. I feel some kind of down and sad that Natasha didn't trusted me enough for telling me about her past.

I understand the reason why she didn't told me but I thought we're close. Maybe she's scared of what I will think about her when she tells me.

There's a knock at my door what takes me out of my thoughts. "Dad I don't want to talk right now." I yell but the door opens. "Not even with me?" I hear her familiar raspy voice and look towards the door.

"Nat? You're finally back." I speak and jump up, running into her arms. "I'm back since an hour and wanted to see you. I just talked with your dad. How are you feeling Detka?" She asks in a worried face and cups my face with her hands.

"I'm better now having you back here. How was the mission going?" I ask, trying to make some conversation because I don't just want to ask something like, hey I heard you're a trained assassin and killed so much innocent people.

"You sure you're okay? You want to talk about something? The mission was easy." She answers and looks into my eyes. "Yeah to be honest I want to talk to you about some things." I answer and look down.

She lifts my face and kisses my lips softly. "Lets sit and talk." She suggests and we sit onto my bed. "What did he told you?" I ask. "That a man wanted to bring you to the red room, to Dreykov." Natasha answers and I can see how her gaze turns into fear when she says his name.

"Did you know that James isn't my biological dad? But this man was?" I ask bluntly and her eyes widen in shock. "WHAT?! No I didn't know that. WHAT?!" She yells still shocked.

"Yeah, I already saw him at the hotel but didn't thought anything. After you left I wanted to go for a walk and he spoke to me and gave me a birth certificate. He is or was my dad, he died in the car accident. Yes we had a car accident." I start telling her and her eyes are still widen.

"He told me you grew up in the red room with my mom and James. You know my mom Natasha and you never told me..." I say it in a more disappointed voice than I wanted.

"I'm so sorry I never told you. I just thought it wasn't important that I know her." She answers and takes my hand in hers. "Or didn't you wanted to tell me that you're a trained assassin? A murderer who killed a lot of innocent people!" My voice raises and I don't even know why.

She pulls her hand away in shock about my words. Her jaw clenches and I can see the guilt written all over her face. She stays quiet, her eyes looking down.

I gently placing two fingers under her chin, lifting her head so she's force to look at me. I stare into this deep green-blue eyes. They are full with guilt and tears.

I pull her closer to me and wrap my arms around her, hearing a quiet sob escaping her lips. Shit. I didn't wanted to hurt her. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that." I apologize to her but she just shakes her head and pulls away.

"No, you're right. Every single word you said is true. I'm a trained assassin who murdered innocent people. I'm a monster Y/N..." She speaks between her always getting louder sobs.

"No Nat, you're everything but not a monster. Please don't say that." I cup her cheek with my hand and she leans into my touch. My thumb wiping her tears away.

"I did a lot of terrible things in my past. I can't change it anymore and I hate myself for what I have done. I'm still haunted by my past in my sleep, in my dreams. Dreykov forced us to kill. We kill or we get killed." She tells me and tries to swallow her next sobs.

"You just tried to survive. I'm sorry for being so rude. I didn't wanted to hurt you. Can you forgive me?" I ask her and feel bad. She lifts her head and looks at me with darken eyes.