My French Son Is A Faggot?!

Heh...

Lyney paces around the House Of The Hearth restlessly, his boots clicking against the wooden floors. He had always been especially effeminate for a man his age, but people wrote it off as part of his eccentric magician shtick.

But it was more than that... Lyney had a secret, and he was finally going to tell his family.

He had to find Father first- if he didn't tell her first, she'd be upset. So he set off, scouring the halls for any sight of her.

She's sat in her study, stooped over a pile of paperwork. She meets Lyney's gaze as soon as soon as he stands in the doorway, as if she senses he was there. "...Lyney." She says coolly. "Do you need something?" She sets her pen down and cups her hands together.

He clears his throat and walks towards Arlecchino. "Yes, Father. I have something to tell you." He stands in front of her desk, fiddling with the hem of his cut off gloves on his fingers. "Out with it," Arlecchino says impatiently.

"Father... I-I-I'm gay. I like boys." He finally said it.

Arlecchino's expression doesn't change whatsoever. "...Is that supposed to be news to me?" She asks flatly. Lyney blinks at her in shock. "Uh... yeah?" She smiles at him. "It's not," she says in her usual intense tone. "Serve cunt, my son."

Lyney smiles back at her. "Thank you, Father.." he says softly. "I wasn't sure if you'd support me."

Suddenly, a voice is heard from the doorway. "WHAT." It bellows out- and Lyney knows immediately... it's the voice of his twin sister. She stomps over to him, her hands on her hips. "The fuck did I just hear you say?" She says in a scathing tone.

"Lyney is gay. He's serving mad cunt right now," Arlecchino says to her daughter Lynette. She had always been the favorite child. Lynette looks furious. "Listen to me," she says, poking him in the chest. "No brother of mine is gonna be gay. I put up with you when you told me you didn't wanna be a girl anymore- but now you want to be a GAY MAN?" She yells at him. "You're going to conversion therapy." Lyney looks terrified.

Arlecchino's gaze hardens. "That's not sigma, Lynette." Lynette stops in her tracks and looks at Arlecchino. "Where the hell did you learn about sigma, Father?"

Freminet speaks up. He's been sitting in the corner the whole time, playing with Pers and listening to his family bicker. "I did," he says quietly. "I taught her everything.. rizz, Ohio, skibidi toilet, fanum tax, livy dunn, baby gronk..."

Everyone stares at Freminet.

"Father is an alpha from Ohio. She's got all six skibidi stones on her skibidi gauntlet," Freminet says.

Arlecchino stands up at her full height of 6'0, looking down at Lyney and Lynette. "You're not Ohio, Lynette." She says in that same cool, calm tone she always uses. "I'm disappointed in you.. you were supposed to have all the rizz. You were supposed to be skibidi, but you're not even fit for Ohio."

Lynette shrinks back a little, knowing Father could beat her ass. "Support your gay transgender brother, Lynette." She says angrily. "Or I shall rip your cat ears off and put them above the hearth in the common room."

Lynette gulps. "Yes, Father.." she says softly. "Here in The House, we don't tolerate bigotry. You should all know this." She crosses her arms. "After all..." she muses, "I'm a lesbian."

Everyone gasps. "Father likes women?" Lyney says in shock. Lynette looks surprised- Freminet looks unbothered. Arlecchino frowns. "...I find it hard to believe that my own children would not be able to guess," she admits.

Freminet pipes up again. "I knew, Father." He says. Arlecchino gives him a tiny smile. "Oh really? Little Freminet... always so introspective." She pats him on the head. "On account of the autism, of course." She looks at her other 2 children, furrowing her brow. "How did all my kids end up autistic?" She shakes her head. "...Never mind. Just so long as you're happy and healthy, that's all that matters."

Lynette looks at her brother. "Sorry for flipping out on you, bro. But I'm still prejudiced against gay people."

Lyney shrugs. "Fair enough!"

And then they all skip off into the sunset. The end.