Harry's POV»
Alice is rushed to an X-Ray where it shows she's broken her wrist in three places. She's automatically given a shot to take the pain away. Tristan holds her down but she doesn't react to anything that's going on. How is she not crying? My poor Alice. She's just so hurt. That fuck Logan definitely got what he deserved. No, I rethink, he's hurt my girl way more than she hurt him. That felt good. My girl. Logan better hope I never see him or he'll be one step away from begging.
The doctor leads me, Alice, and Tristan to a room to await the rest of the X-Ray's results.
"Alice, I saw the X-Ray. Your going to need surgery on it to make sure the bones are in the right places so your bones mend correctly. Logan really screwed your wrist up." Tristan tells Alice gently. "I'm going home to pick up a few things so I can stay here with you. Do you want anything from your house?"
Alice doesn't talk she just looks beyond him, ignoring his body blocking her view. "Alice, don't push me away." he begs her. She ignores him. "Fine. I'll just grab you some clothes then."
He turns to leave but then Alice whispers. "Grab the book on my bed please."
Tristan's body relaxes a little when he hears her voice. "Anything for you Ali cat." Then he leaves me and Alice alone in the sterile room.
"Ali cat?" I question her. "He has a nickname for you?"
"He knows I don't like cats. He teasing me. Alice sounds better than just Ali. I prefer Alice." Alice voice is very monotone and factual.
"Alice, are you okay, Love?" I get close to her an push her hair back to look into the eyes I love.
"I'm fine."
"Alice, today is the day you have to do whatever I like, right?" I ask her. I have a plan.
"Yes. It is."
"Then I know what I want. I want you to stop lying to me. You're not fine and that's obvious." I stroke her scars on her unbroken arm. "I also need you to never cut yourself again. I want your blades. Every single one of them." I look into her eyes to make sure she understands. "Never ever again Love. And there's two more things I need."
Her eyes are filling with tears. "I need you to talk to me. Tell me exactly how you're feeling. Don't hide behind your smile. Your eyes tell me it's not real." I lay her back on the hospital bed. Tears stream out of her eyes, silently. "I need one more thing. I need you to trust me. With everything Alice. I wanna be here for you. I want you to be able to trust me with your thoughts so you won't be alone with them. You don't have to hurt alone, Love. I'm here now. I won't l leave you." I kiss her lips so softly. Be gentle with her, my mind tells me. She's about to break.
"Do you promise me you'll do those things for me Alice?" I say delicately into her hair over her ear.
"I don't know if I'm even capable of any of those things." She still whispers to me.
"You're capable of a lot more than you think. You're so strong. Your wrist it terribly broken and you didn't cry the whole time. You don't need to self harm. You can talk to me. All you need to do is trust me and then you can do the rest." I just wanna tell her that I love her, that I need her. But I can't. I'd scare her away. I can't lose her, I need her to trust me first.
"But if I trust you I'll get hurt."Her voice has lost its monotone quality. She really thinks I'll hurt her.
"I'd never hurt you. Not intentionally. I promised I wouldn't leave you. Trust me?" I beg her.
"I don't know how." She tells me. "I don't think I can."
"Take a chance. You just need to believe that I'm not going to hurt you. Please?" This girl is broken. This girl has me in the palm of her hand.
Alice looks into my eyes and she studies me. She looks so hopeless right now. I know what Logan said must have really hurt her. "I trust you." Her words are careful. She trusts me. I can't help but smile. I lean over her and kiss her cheek. She's stopped crying but the trails from the tears are salty on my lips.
"I can't stand to see you cry." I tell her. "Your too good to cry so much."
"I'm sorry." I sit down on the hospital bed next to Alice and tug her body close to mine.
"I don't want you to cry, but I'd much rather you cry with me here than hurt yourself when I'm not. Why didn't you cry when he broke your wrist?" I want to know how she could withstand that amount of pain and not even whimper.
She takes a deep breathe. "I don't like to let people know when I'm hurt. I don't trust people enough, and its going to be hard for me to trust you too. You block out the pain; you almost feel numb, and everything around you doesn't matter. You feel lost. That's why I wasn't really talking. It didn't matter what anyone said. I was numb."
I just stare at her. She didn't feel any of it? "Is that normal?"
"It is for me. You kind of have to do that after a while." Her eyes travel down to her arms. "That's not all my scars, Harry."
What? "What do you mean Alice?" There can't be more, can there? She pulls her basketball shorts up her leg to reveal her thigh. Her pale skin is decorated with pink and white horizontal lines. More scars. There's so many there you can't count them, but each is perfectly straight and almost exactly the same length as the last. "Oh God."
"You told me to trust you. Tristan doesn't even know about these ones."
"Why, Alice?"
"Because it hurts. I need it to hurt."
"You don't have to hurt anymore. I'm here." I say gently into her ear. She doesn't say anything else about it. She tells me she's tired, and we lay back on the small bed together. Alice lays mostly on me, and I hold her in my arms, and within five minutes she's asleep. "I'll protect you." I say. And then I wait for the doctor or Tristan to come.
