October, 3rd 1941

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After I was sent to the Eastern Front at the age of 19, I only experienced terrible things. I'm here right now as a medic, caring for the injured or sick soldiers while the Germans are messing with us. The area here is dark and the atmosphere is almost unbearable. There are corpses everywhere of the men who died for their country. How can a person who was once full of happiness, love and good smell now take on the smell of the surrounding corpses and terrifyingly faces?

At the beginning I had so many negative feelings about the war, which feels unpredictably long, but right now it just gives me motivation. I want the men to get out of here alive and it doesn't matter whether they lose 1 arm, 1 leg or even their eyesight, I want to help them. The circumstances here are unimaginably terrible and cruel. Most of the soldiers who are with me, or rather with us, either have typhus, were burned or shot, and some even simply collapse. But how not? Every day, strange food, sometimes nothing at all, contaminated water and a terribly dirty environment. Not only is the environment dirty, but so is the attitude of the Germans. How can one person cause so much harm and send people who have caused no harm to damnation. will I ever be able to understand it? I don't think so, but I still hope that the horrible, fearful war will finally stop.

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