The Shadow Of A Trainee | Bang Chan ✔️

Chapter 9.

Mirae's P.O.V

I walked into the practice room, only to be met with Chan's sharp gaze. His eyes locked onto me, stern and unwavering.

"Where were you?" he asked, his tone low but firm.

My mind scrambled for a response, but before I could say anything, Felix leaned over my shoulder, his signature grin plastered on his face.

"JYP wanted her," Felix said with a playful nudge. "Something about a meeting."

Chan's expression softened, and with a brief nod, he let it slide. Relief washed over me, but I kept my face neutral.

---

Later that night, I ordered dinner for the boys—exactly what each of them liked. They dove into the bags, their tired faces lighting up at the sight of the food. But Hyunjin's sharp eyes caught the missing detail almost immediately.

"Where's yours?" he asked, nudging me with an elbow.

I shrugged, playing it off. "I'm not hungry."

It was a lie, of course. My stomach ached, but I couldn't bring myself to join them. There was safety in the distance, better to keep things professional, even though they were slowly pulling me into their world. Too close meant too complicated.

The night ended in exhaustion. After showers and quick goodnights, everyone disappeared into their rooms. The dorm finally fell silent. A rare, peaceful kind of quiet.

---

Now, it's the next morning, I woke up early, the first rays of sunlight filtering through the curtains. The dorm was still asleep, shrouded in the same quietness as the night before.

A small smile tugged at my lips. Of course, they're still asleep, none of them are morning people.

After washing up, I changed into baggy sweatpants and an oversized hoodie, tying my hair into a messy bun. I stood by my bedroom window, letting the cool morning breeze drift through it.

And that's when I saw him. Chan. He was sitting outside on one of the benches in the garden, the soft morning light painting him in gold.

For a moment, I just stood there, watching him from the window. The sun highlighted the curve of his nose and the gentle angle of his jaw. His lips rested in a calm, neutral expression, as if he was finally free from the burdens that always weighed on him.

He looked peaceful, almost vulnerable, and I couldn't help but admire the quiet strength in his face. His eyes, those warm, brown eyes, held something deep and unspoken, like secrets only he knew.

I shook my head, trying to snap myself out of it. No, no, no, Mirae. What are you doing? You work for him.

I forced my gaze away and walked toward the kitchen, hoping to distract myself. A task—something to clear my head. Tea. I'd make tea.

Balancing two mugs of tea, I made my way outside. As soon as Chan saw me, his face lit up with that familiar, heart-melting smile.

"Good morning," I said softly, handing him one of the cups.

"Good morning," he replied, his smile deepening as he accepted the tea.

"Can I sit?" I asked, already knowing the answer but still wanting the permission.

"Sure." He scooted over, patting the spot beside him. "Is this for me?"

I nodded. "Figured you could use it."

His smile widened as he wrapped both hands around the mug. "Thanks. I really needed this."

I sat down beside him, tucking my knees up to my chest. The morning breeze carried the scent of tea and dew, and for a moment, we just sat there, letting the calm settle over us.

"What are you doing out here so early?" I asked, blowing on my tea.

Chan exhaled, sending tiny ripples across the surface of his drink. "Couldn't sleep. Just wanted to enjoy the quiet before the chaos starts."

I chuckled. "You're right. The boys aren't exactly known for being quiet."

He laughed, the sound light and genuine. "Yeah, but I don't mind. Their noise feels like... life. During training, the silence felt heavy, like I was drowning in it. But now, the chaos fills that emptiness."

His words hit me harder than I expected. I thought about my own trainee days, how I never found that kind of noise to fill the silence. Instead, I learned to live with it, to make peace with the quiet. Or maybe not peace—just endurance.

JYP's warning echoed in my mind: If you want to stay, keep your mouth shut. I don't want to hear anything about you again.

I stared off into the horizon, lost in the ache of old memories.

"Earth to Mirae," Chan's voice broke through my thoughts. He waved a hand in front of my face, his expression playful.

"Sorry," I mumbled, feeling my cheeks heat up.

Chan chuckled, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Didn't think I was that boring."

"You're not boring," I blurted, and my face flushed even more. "Actually..." I hesitated, then smiled shyly. "I think of you as a role model."

His expression shifted—soft and surprised. His gaze locked onto mine, warm and searching, as if trying to understand the weight behind my words.

I looked away, suddenly self-conscious. Clearing my throat, I focused on the tea in my hands.

The silence between us stretched, but it wasn't awkward. It was comfortable, like the kind of quiet shared between two people who didn't need words to feel understood.

I felt his gaze on me again, and slowly, I raised an eyebrow, a playful smile tugging at my lips. "What?"

Chan tilted his head slightly. "I'm just trying to understand you."

"Me?" I asked, amused.

He nodded. "You never talk about yourself, but the boys seem to connect with you. They trust you."

I shrugged, trying to downplay the compliment. "I just want to earn their trust... to feel like I belong."

His eyes softened at my words, and something stirred inside me, a small fragile feeling I hadn't let myself feel in a long time.

For a moment, we sat there in silence again, the tea in our hands growing cold. But neither of us cared.

And in that quiet moment, something shifted. Something subtle and unspoken.

For the first time in what felt like forever, I felt like maybe—just maybe—I wasn't so alone.

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A/N:

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