just my thoughts

road

life could be easily compared to a road.
it's stupidly obvious it will not stay straight all the time. it has its ups and downs, some days it's more bumpy, and some it's so smooth, your car, being yourself, moves with such ease, almost gliding on it.

and still with that in mind, when it stays the same for too long, you being to wonder.

so i began to think.
lately everything's been going downhill, and rather in a sense of falling deeper into a dark deep pit, from which the only way out is hard and demanding.

i really hate this. when you'd think you'd gotten so much better, so much so things would only keep on becoming better and easier, but to your disappointment.. it gets even worse than before.

it sometimes makes me wonder whether it actually is worth all this fighting?

it seems like everyone around me is moving forward, while i'm stuck, left behind. alone and tired. though i didn't do much after all. i was just existing, surviving the day as any other. fighting no other than myself.
silently, invisibly.

sigh. then what would happen if all of a sudden my journey came to an end, my chapter to a close?

if my entire body gave up. my lungs stopped taking in air, if my heart took
a final beating. if in a split moment my shadow evanescenced from the sight of others, if my body faded from the face of earth. if i disappeared. with no trace left of me.

then would anyone notice? or would they just shrug at it?

cause after all the sun is still shining, the wind is still blowing, the trees are still growing, life still goes on.
it wouldn't just stop if i weren't here.

thoughts as such swarm my mind, making it hard to see past them.

then an echoing sound. a message. a distraction perhaps, but even more so
a reason, a helping hand, which never even knew what it was doing, did in fact save me.

so thank You God for giving me so many reasons, despite everything else, like me being the person that i am.