MULTIVERSE Crossover Scripts

I'M NOT GARFIELD!

[SHOWS OR MOVIES USED: Heathcliff, Hannah Montana, Stuck In The Middle, Wizards of Waverly Place, Victorious, Garfield]

INT. STREET ALLEY - DAY

HEATHCLIFF THE CAT sits in front of a webcam looking seriously into the camera showing that he's clearly a little annoyed today. The area behind him is decorated with a few random items thrown around, like a fish skeleton and some garbage cans for decoration.

HEATHCLIFF : (exasperated) Alright, listen to me, internet! We need to talk. I've been dealing with something for way too long, and I'm finally putting my paw down. I'm not Garfield! I don't know how many times I gotta say it. We're both orange and we're cats, sure, but that's where the comparison ends, people!

HEATHCLIFF leans closer to the camera, his frustration evident.

HEATHCLIFF : (continuing) And the worst part? It's not just random people making this mistake. It's, like, everyone. Seriously, check this out.

The screen cuts to a montage of people encountering Heathcliff but mistaking him for Garfield. The first clip starts at a mall, where HANNAH MONTANA excitedly rushing up to HEATHCLIFF who's just trying to steal something from the food court.

HANNAH: (grinning) OMG! Garfield! You are so funny! Can we get a selfie?

HEATHCLIFF facepalms, visibly irritated.

HEATHCLIFF: (sarcastic) Yeah, sure. Because I totally sit around eating lasagna all day...

The montage continues with HARLEY DIAZ walking up to Heathcliff while he's lounging on a fence.

HARLEY: (excited) Hey, Garfield! My siblings are obsessed with your comics. Can you give a shoutout?

HEATHCLIFF rolls his eyes dramatically.

HEATHCLIFF: (deadpan) If I hear "Garfield" one more time, I swear to god...

Then, it jumps to ALEX RUSSO, casually flipping through a spellbook when she sees Heathcliff passing by the WAVERLY SUB STATION trying to steal a sandwich.

ALEX: (confident) Hey Garfield! Need a spell to get more lasagna? I got you.

HEATHCLIFF lets out an exaggerated sigh.

HEATHCLIFF: (muttering) Yeah, sure. And maybe while you're at it, you can make everyone remember my actual name.

The montage then cuts to TORI VEGA walking to NOZU SUSHI with her friends. She sees HEATHCLIFF walking by and calls out.

TORI: (waving) Hey Garfield! How's Odie doing?

HEATHCLIFF, completely fed up now, glares at her.

HEATHCLIFF: (shouting) I don't have a dog! I don't even like dogs!

The montage ends as we cut back to HEATHCLIFF sitting in front of the camera, looking like he's had enough.

HEATHCLIFF: (fuming) This is my life, people. Every time I step outside, it's, "Hey, Garfield, love your lasagna!" "Garfield, where's Odie?" I DON'T EVEN LIKE DOGS! And I eat fish bones, not lasagna! I'm Heathcliff, the one and only. King of the streets, ruler of the alley, not some lazy housecat!

HEATHCLIFF takes a deep breath, calming himself down a bit, though still clearly annoyed.

HEATHCLIFF: (grumbling) Look, I get it. We're both orange and we're both cats. But I'm tougher, I'm smarter, and I don't spend my entire day napping. You'd never see me being all lazy like that. So let's clear this up once and for all. I'm Heathcliff.

HEATHCLIFF points at the camera dramatically.

HEATHCLIFF: Garfield's got nothing on me. Now spread the word, because if I hear "lasagna" one more time, someone's gonna get clawed!

HEATHCLIFF stands up and storms off-screen, knocking over a trash can as he exits.

THE END:

COPYRIGHT DATE: 10/16/24