𝕱𝖆𝖉𝖊𝖉 𝕾𝖈𝖆𝖗𝖘-𝕶𝖚𝖗𝖔𝖐𝖊𝖓 (𝕶𝖊𝖓𝖒𝖆 𝕬𝖓𝖌𝖘𝖙/𝕮𝖔𝖒𝖋𝖔𝖗𝖙)

Angst

It's late at night, and the gym is empty, save for the two of them. The sound of the ball bouncing echoes through the space, filling the silence between them. Kuroo's been trying to get Kenma to stay later, to practice more. Not that Kenma is ever truly out of practice-he's sharp, always focused, but lately something has been off.

The gym lights cast a harsh, clinical glow, but the real world outside feels far away, a blur. The only thing real is the slow exhaustion creeping in on Kenma's shoulders and the way Kuroo's eyes never leave him.

Kenma dropped the ball for the umpteenth time that night, his fingers twitching with frustration. He bent down, grabbing it again, but the movement felt like it took far more energy than it should have.

Kuroo, who had been sitting on the bleachers, watching Kenma with an intensity that felt almost too much, stood up. His footsteps were loud in the empty gym as he approached.

"You okay, Kenma?" Kuroo's voice was playful, like always, but Kenma could hear the edge of concern that had been creeping in for weeks now.

Kenma didn't respond immediately. He just stared at the floor, his fingers pressing against the cool surface of the ball. He didn't want to look at Kuroo, because he wasn't sure how to explain himself.

"I'm fine," Kenma muttered, his voice quiet but clipped.

Kuroo tilted his head, eyeing Kenma with a knowing look. He knew Kenma too well. Too many years spent together, too many moments of silent understanding. Kenma had never been one for talking, and Kuroo had always been there, filling the silences with laughter, teasing, and loudness.

But lately, that laughter was starting to feel like an echo. Kuroo was used to being the one to break Kenma's silence, to drag him out of his shell, but for the first time in a long while, he wasn't sure if Kenma wanted to come out.

"Kenma," Kuroo said again, his tone softer now, more gentle. "Don't lie to me."

Kenma finally looked up, his eyes glazed, unfocused. He didn't look at Kuroo directly. He couldn't. There was too much there, too much weight in those eyes. Kenma was always used to the quiet, the isolation of his thoughts. But right now, standing there, he felt suffocated by the presence of Kuroo, by the unspoken things between them.

"You don't have to pretend," Kuroo continued, his voice quieter, more serious than usual. "You don't have to keep everything bottled up. Not with me."

Kenma's chest tightened. "I'm not pretending," he replied, but his voice shook despite himself. "I'm just... tired."

Kuroo frowned, taking a few steps forward, his gaze hardening. "Tired of what? The game? Or-" He cut himself off before he could finish. He already knew the answer. Kenma's tiredness wasn't about volleyball. It wasn't about practice or training. It was something deeper, something Kuroo had been too scared to admit.

Kenma dropped the ball again, and this time, he didn't bother picking it up. His hands trembled slightly as he crossed his arms, the walls he'd built around himself growing taller with every passing second. He was so tired of pretending he had everything figured out. Of pretending he wasn't drowning in the pressure, in the weight of expectations, in the loneliness that came with always being on the outside.

"Everything's just... too much lately," Kenma whispered, his voice small. "I'm tired of pretending I'm okay when I'm not. I'm tired of trying to be... enough. I don't even know who I'm doing all this for anymore."

Kuroo's heart dropped into his stomach. He had seen it-seen the way Kenma had been pulling away, the way the light behind his eyes had started to dim. But hearing him say it out loud made everything feel like it was shattering into pieces.

"I-" Kuroo's voice broke for a moment. "Kenma, you are enough. You're more than enough. I-"

Kenma shook his head, cutting him off. His eyes, full of emotion, avoided Kuroo's. He was silent for a long moment, and then the words spilled out like a confession, quiet but heavy.

"You don't understand," Kenma said softly. "I'm tired of being the one who holds everything together. I'm always... watching. Watching everyone, watching you, and just... feeling like I'm always on the outside. Like no matter what I do, I can never catch up with all the things everyone expects of me."

Kuroo stepped forward, reaching out, but Kenma flinched, pulling back slightly. It wasn't that he didn't want the comfort. He just couldn't bring himself to accept it. Not right now.

"I don't even know how to talk to you anymore," Kenma whispered, barely loud enough for Kuroo to hear. "How can I say what's really going on when I'm not even sure myself? I don't even know who I am anymore."

Kuroo's throat tightened, and without thinking, he closed the distance between them, his hand on Kenma's shoulder. "You're Kenma," he said, his voice fierce. "You're the guy who always knows when I need help. You're the guy who's always been there, even when no one else could see. You're the guy who's made me laugh when I wanted to quit. That's who you are."

Kenma let out a shaky breath, the tears threatening to spill from his eyes. His mind felt like a storm of confusion, of pain, and all the things he'd never known how to say.

"I don't know if I can do this anymore," Kenma said softly, his voice cracking. "I don't know if I can keep pretending like it doesn't hurt."

Kuroo's grip tightened on Kenma's shoulder, pulling him in close, his other hand gently cupping Kenma's face, guiding it so their eyes finally met. "You don't have to do this alone, Kenma. I'm right here, okay? I'm not going anywhere."

Kenma closed his eyes, letting the weight of Kuroo's words settle over him. He wasn't sure if he could believe them yet, but it was enough to let himself break for just a moment.

The silence between them stretched, but it wasn't uncomfortable. It wasn't filled with tension or distance. It was just... understanding. The kind that Kenma had always found in Kuroo.

And for the first time in a long while, Kenma didn't feel so alone.

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Finally, my first completed book! Anyways, thank you so much for reading!