It was a late Tuesday evening, there was a faint smell of vanilla lingering in the air from perfume sprayed in the early morning. The lighting was dim in my bedroom as I sat on my bed with my laptop resting in my lap. I sat there trying to focus and do my homework. I just couldn't though because my mind was running a million miles an hour with everything that occurred the night before. The night before I had my heart broke into a million pieces as I sat in my room on my phone with the TV on for background noise. I realized I wouldn't be able to write the paper without letting it out, so I opened a new document on Microsoft Word and typed out every single thing I was thinking and every single thing I had felt. I did quite literally pour my whole heart and soul out with every word I typed out with the press of keys on my keyboard. I wrote everything out from the start of the relationship to the end of it. I wrote every moment that brought me happiness even if it was from the little gestures that were made, I wrote about the confusion I sometimes felt from the mixed signals, the sadness I felt when we were apart, the sadness I felt after he ended everything without so much as a goodbye or a reason why just a push of a button, the anger I felt because of how much hurt was caused. I wrote and wrote and wrote for well over an hour before I stopped. I read back everything I wrote before opening another document, summarizing it, and turning it into a letter addressed to him. Writing it all out made me feel relief, it made it possible to think about the memories without my eyes instantaneously watering, it helped me not feel sick to my stomach every waking second, and it also helped me be able to sleep without waking every hour hoping to see a texted or a call from him.
