Harriet Jinjur vs. the Academy

Chapter 8: A Spirited Turn of Events

Harriet quickly took Aloysius to her room, which just as she thought, Jill the jackalope is sitting on her big bed, gnawing on her wand that she left on the comforter. It's a good thing Bert didn't decide to put it away from her while she was out getting rid of the pet.

"So..." Aloysius began shockingly. "...you said you found her in a carcass."

"I did, so I guess I have a pet now," said Harriet. "I'm not complaining. Jill looks normal enough. I just wish she wouldn't teleport corpses around like nobody's business."

"Actually, it's the transplantation fluid inside Gloucester doing all that," he explained. "Sea serpents tend to get worked up in order to transport in short distances, which you would've known if you hadn't decided to sneak off my lesson."

Harriet then snaps, "Lay off it already! And it's not even your lesson! You just popped a tape in the VCR instead of bothering to teach me something I'd just forget."

Aloysius could only growl at her disdainfully.

"So, spill," said Harriet. "What do you know about her?"

"You mean the jackalope?" Aloysius indicated Jill, still gnawing on the wand.

"Of course, Dippy," groaned Harriet. "And I don't wanna another oldass film out of your fancy twig! I'd rather hear it from your own mouth."

"Well, there's not that much history about them. For starters, they were meant to be a taxidermy prank, but sources beforehand claim there's been evidence of them roaming in the..."

"Al..." Harriet put her hand on her forehead. "When you say 'there's not that much history,' I was really hoping ya cut to the chase. Now, tell me why this particular rodent's so fond of me!"

"Jackalopes aren't even rodents..." he stated.

"You gonna be that guy, Al? 'Cause I have a slingshot on me with your prepubescent name on it."

Aloysius growls and then says bitterly in three broad words, "It requires magic."

"Magic?" Harriet's face turns red and lets out an agonized yell. "Of course it is! What other rational thing requires it?!"

"Stop being so critical and hand me my wand," the young Spinks demanded.

"What?"

"My wand? The one I left in Theoretical History?" he then eyed Harriet. "You did get my wand before ditching, right?"

Harriet could only look in the opposite direction to avoid his glare.

"You think my wand can do well for you with all that rabbit spit?"

"You left it," said Aloysius. "Unbelievable! I can't even trust you with my own wand!"

"Hey! I can't help it if your stupid presentation made me numb. So, don't get your knickers in a castration knot!" Harriet said sharply. "I'll just head back where I left it, grab it, and then we'll continue our little mystery lesson."

"But my father's probably there by now..." he claimed. "...and I'm sure he's livid about me neglecting you thanks to your negligence!"

"And who's fault is that?"

Aloysius is just about had with this further humiliation, "Forget the wand! I already have the perfect spell in mind anyway."

"Really?" Harriet's eyes lit up. "Then, why didn't you lead with that?"

"It's hard to give out information to the uninitiated when you lack the source at hand! Otherwise, you're just rambling like a conspiracy theorist."

"I can see the family resemblance," Harriet couldn't help but to snide.