Ryan wouldn't talk to me at all. This meant that it was awkward for me to come to band practice, so I didn't go. I know Spencer missed me there, and so did Brendon. I went straight home one afternoon, even though I knew there was a band practice. Spencer tried to talk me into going, but I just couldn't. I didn't want to be the reason for a toxic atmosphere.
I did my homework and then laid on my bed and read my book. I got up because there was a knock on the front door. I was surprised when I opened it and Brendon was standing there.
"Hello, Brendon. "
"Hi, Lulu. " He replied.
"What's up?" I asked, inviting him into the house.
"I wanted to make sure that you are ok." Brendon explained as I led him through to our kitchen.
"Soda?" I offered, and he nodded.
"Yea, I am ok." I answered.
"Yea, sure you are. Can I have the truth now, please?" Brendon said as he opened his can of soda.
"That is the truth." I retorted. Brendon put his soda down and walked towards me. He placed his hands on my shoulders.
"Lu, I know you are hurting. You haven't come to band practice for ages." I shrugged my shoulders and looked down. Brendon lifted my chin to look at him. I sighed. Brendon smiled and looked into my eyes.
"I thought it would be easier to not come for a while, that's all. I can't just stop loving Ryan." I sniffed, and that's when i realised I was crying. Brendon hugged me. He stroked my hair.
"You know, he's feeling as miserable as you."
"Then why? I don't understand Brendon!"
"Who knows the mysterious complexity of Ryan Ross' brain?" Brendon chuckled. "Next band practice, come. We all miss you."
I had already had this with Spencer trying to talk me into going.
"All?"
"Yea, all. Even though he won't admit it." Brendon cupped my cheeks and kissed my forehead. He engulfed me in a big hug. He smelt so good and felt so cosy. Wait, what? Was I developing feelings for Brendon, or was it because I feel so miserable?
2 days later, I went to the next band practice. I took my normal place on the couch with my homework. Spencer came over and hugged me. Brendon grinned and winked at me. Brent waved hello. Ryan, well, he saw me but didn't say or do anything. I tapped my foot along as I got through my math and English homework. It was such a hot day today. I had a tank top and shorts on, with my slip-on vans.
I walked into Spencers kitchen and got myself some ice in a towel for my neck plus a soda. Laying on the sofa for a while, I put the ice pack on my neck and forehead. I had my back to the guys. I must have fallen asleep because I was shaken awake by Brendon. It was dark.
"Fuck! What time is it?" I said.
"It's nearly 7.30." He replied. All the guys are still here. I felt like I was going to puke, so I ran for Spencers downstairs bathroom.
The next thing I know, there was a hand holding my hair back. I finished and sat against the tile. "You ok now?" Brendon asked. I nodded.
"Can I have some water, please?"
He got up and went to get me a bottle of water. I kept looking to see if Ryan would appear. He didn't. I guess that I had to resign myself to the fact that we are well and truly over. I sighed deeply and hung my head as I sat on my best friends bathroom floor, sipping water and crying. Brendon sat beside me and put an arm around my shoulders. He squeezed me to him.
"It's ok, Lulu." He tried to soothe me. Spencer came through and explained that Ryan and Brent had gone home. He crouched down and lifted my chin.
"Shh, Lu, he's not worth any more of your tears. He couldn't even act like a decent human being and see if you were OK." I looked at Spencer, and I agreed with him. I knelt up and hugged him.
"I need to go home."
"Why? Are your parents expecting you?" Spencer asked. I shook my head.
"Both away with work." I replied.
"Stay here." Spencer said.
"Spence, I can't. I have nothing to wear."
"Even better!" Brendon piped up raising his eyebrows in a suggestive manner. I laughed at him.
"I can lend you something to wear. It's Friday, so there's no school tomorrow. Come on. Brendons staying, too. We can watch movies and eat popcorn. I can't remember the last time we did that."
"Sure." I say. "I need a shower, though." Spencer smiled and then said.
"You know where everything is."
