The Smiling Interview

Kaluma

The black leather shoes finally give in, achieving the desired smooth, glossy finish that reflects the light elegantly. Kaluma pats his notably thin chest in admiration as his slender fingers gently graze the luxurious fabric of the navy blue Italian suit. He grins broadly, like a he-goat letting out a boisterous laugh as he presses the padlock to his bedsitter in Nairobi's Roysambu estate. Joy swells—he has saved enough to rent this attire, the key to smashing the interview. 

He dreams of becoming the Country's manager at the prestigious Maringo Furniture PLC. After all, he has aced all 4 preliminary virtual stages, emerging from over 20,000 applicants nationwide to land in the top 10. Kaluma is convinced his past failures stemmed from under-dressing.

At 7 am, he arrives at Maringo, a beautifully structured premise that exudes comfort and serenity. The waiting area features comfy mahogany chairs that could lull a troubled soul like his into slumber. Even with the tempting offer of hot coffee and mandazi, he resists the urge to sit. He spends the hour walking around the compound, admiring the executive office structures and familiarizing himself with the environment in readiness for the upcoming role.

When it's finally Kaluma's turn, questions are quite technical but easy for someone of his caliber, a first-class graduate. The three-bench interviewers, two ladies and a gentleman appear impressed by his responses. The professional smiles assure him he's on the right track.

"Your record through the stages is quite impressive. You are indeed who you say you are in your resume. Do you have any questions for us?

"The sun-kissed, chocolate-toned lady chimes, her radiant smile barely concealed.

Kaluma clears his throat and replies, "Thank you so much for your affirmation. I only have one question. How much are you guys being paid for all the grilling?

"An awkward silence ensues. The three exchange surprised glances as if they've just encountered a different person.

Suddenly, an alarm clock on their desk rings, signaling the end of the interview. The light-skinned gentleman with a sparse gray beard smiles and says,

"We enjoyed your story man. Unfortunately, our time is up. We will call you. Please do not contact us. All the best!"Kaluma joins the other interviewees waiting outside, ready to leave together and network. Upon reaching the gate, three people receive calls instructing them to return to the boardroom and sign contracts. Kaluma is not among them.