Lifetime (LingOrm version)

October

Imagine marrying the love of your life.





And when the day finally came in October,





after a few moments of instructions,

the wedding march began,





the wedding music sounded,

 and the bride's maids and the ring bearer began to walk down the aisle.





The love of my life, on the arm of her father, Mr. Sethratanapong, Nong Orm looked radiant.

She looked ahead and smiled at me. Tears sprang into her eyes as she walked down the aisle.





Everything about her is beautiful.





Her smile. I feel gratitude in my heart each time she smiles at me which brightens my world, especially when I'm the reason behind it.






Her amber eyes. I swear the whole universe danced in her eyes the day I met her, where I got lost in.





Her face. It could launch a thousand ships.





Her hands. Every time it held mine, it put my heart's at home.





Her personality. It makes her more perfect, that captured my heart.





Her comfort and encouragement give me help through all the despair.




Her support pushes me towards my dreams and goals.




Her perfect imperfections.




Her.




Orm Kornnapat Sethratanapong.

My love.






"Dear friends and family, we are gathered here today to witness and celebrate the union of ..."









Back to the days of our college life-




When you didn't hesitate to welcome me in your life.



Orm: Hello, Phi Ling!

Ling: H-hi, Nong Orm!

Orm: Are you free this weekend?

Ling: I think so, w-why?

Orm: Want to see a movie?

Ling: S-sure.

Orm: Great! See you!






Orm: Hey, so I'm having a party at my place this Saturday. Do you want to come?

Ling: Sure! That sounds like fun. Who else is coming?

Orm: Let's see. I think it's going to be Kwang, Bow, Rati, Susie, Tan, Love, and possibly Milk. It's not really going to be a party, more like a small get-together. I'm cooking dinner, and we can just hang out.

Ling: What time should I be there?

Orm: Oh, anytime between 6 and 7 would be fine.

Ling: Can I invite Junji to come with me?

Orm: Sure, no problem!

Ling: Can I bring a bottle of wine?

Orm: Well, I'm not going to say no to wine. I'm sure that would be appreciated.

Ling: I'll do that, then. Thanks for inviting me.






"Today, as they join in marriage, they also create a new bond and new sense of family - one that will undoubtedly include all who are present here today."





When soon we became friends and made plans with each other.




"Phi Ling, let's watch this horror movie everyone's talking about."



"Nong Orm, no, please? Let's just watch The Secret of Us."



"Uggh Phi Ling, but we've watched that 20 times already."



"Nong Orm, please."



"Okay."





"True marriage is more than simply joining two persons together through the bonds of matrimony. It is also the union of two hearts and the blending of two families."






"Phi Ling, come quickly and don't forget the flavor of ice cream I've been craving."



"Of course, I don't want to deal with granny Nong Orm later."



"Yah, do you have a death wish?"



"Spare my life, Nong Orm!"



"Whatever"



"Geez this childish-granny"



"Yah!!"




When soon we upgraded our plans and spend our long weekends to go to amusement park, hiking, camping, and everything that's related to our love in breathtaking sceneries. Those deepest and most meaningful conversations we've had happened around a campfire. It was all worth it.




"Nong Orm, open your eyes."


"No, Phi Ling"


"Trust me, you'll love the view."



The Ferris wheel stops at the top and we can see all across the entire park.






"It lives on the love you give each other and never grows old, but also thrives on the joy of each new day. Marriage is, and should be, an expression of love."






"WOW! Phi Ling, look!"


The view and rewards after the long hike was definitely worth all those hours of hard walk, especially looking at Nong Orm who loves this scenery although not a happy camper, but usually comes with me.



"Phi Ling, let's take a picture there!!"



"I love it, Phi Ling! I love it! I love it!"









When the days you were there when I get sick.




You would come over and cook for me.



"Phi Ling, get up and I'll feed you."



"I can feed myself, Nong Orm."



"Don't argue with me. Just say aaaah"



You fed me.


You took care of me.


And vice versa.


I did the same.


I love taking care of a sick Nong Orm because it's a grumpy Nong Orm.





"May you be blessed with a lifetime of happiness and a home of warmth and understanding."






When you went with me to volunteer in a Pet Rescue and Sanctuary despite of you, being scared of dogs.



When we see each other at our worst.



When we challenge each other to grow.



When we root for each other.



When I call you to come save me.




"Thank you, Nong Orm."


"That's what best friends do, Phi Ling."


"Thank you for always being here, Nong Orm."


"Same with you, Phi Ling. Thank you."





When we make fun of each other. I would laugh a minute at your silliness. You would laugh your head off to my face.





When you introduced me to your parents.




When you spend your summer with me in Hongkong to meet my parents.




And then here comes when I realized I am so in love with you.





"Do you Orm Kornnapat, take ...."






Ling is being clouded with memories. Tears are forming but she wouldn't let it fall. Not now.




"to be your partner in life and to share a path of life with; equal in love, embraced as a mirror for your true self, promising to honor and cherish her/him, through good times and bad, until death do you part?"





We got used to each other.





"I do." Nong Orm answered.






I should be happy right? But why's it tearing me apart? Why does it hurt so much?






Nong Orm, who supported me.

Defended me.

Comforted me.

Protected me.

And.

Loved me.

















"Do you Ying Anada, take Orm to be your partner in life and to share a path of life with; equal in love, embraced as a mirror for your true self, promising to honor and cherish her/him, through good times and bad, until death do you part?"





"Yes, I do."





Right. Nong Orm is marrying someone else.





Ling breathes in slowly, emptying her lungs with Orm's memories.

She tilts her head up and blinks rapidly to keep her tears from falling. Distracting her body, she dig her nails into her skin and bit her lip until she could taste the salt of blood.

She can feel the symphony of pain in her head, conducting an opus of excruciating, devastating perfecting.

The surge of regret and agony is crawling in her chest.

Too heavy for her because she never dared to tell her feelings to Orm, afraid to lose what they have.

"I am a coward and a loser. And I will suffer alone." She thinks to her self.




"I guess, this is a lifetime of sorrow and pain I'll carry and there are no other ways to stop it, but to learn to live with it.

I have fallen in my capacity to live with what I have wrought.

I can't promise to myself to get better any time soon. But, I will eventually. For now I'll take all the time I need.

And I promise I'll find you in another life and still choose you.

I will keep choosing you every time in every lifetime.

Until we meet again, where we could have spend our lifetime as lovers.

I love you, Orm Kornnapat Sethratanapong."