Bestow Your Affections On (Highschool Series #1)

Chapter 28

I spent the entire summer in the hospital, watching over my mom. Napakahina na ni Mama, and it scared the hell out of me. Kilala na ako ng mga nurse by name, and the doctors stopped sugar-coating things around me. I learned to read her monitors, know when she was in pain before she even said a word, and I got pretty good at making her smile even when she was too tired to laugh. Pakiramdam ko tuloy, tumanda ako ng sampung taon sa loob ng isang buwan.

Despite everything, my dad was there too, doing his best to care for her. It was awkward at first—he had a new family now, and things between us had been tense for a while. Pero habang tumatagal sa ospital, something shifted. He stopped being the man who left us, and I started to see him as someone who still deeply cared about my mom. Kahit hindi kami masyadong nag-uusap, his presence was comforting in a way I hadn’t expected.

Nung malapit na ang pasukan, halos nakalimutan ko na ang school. Paano ko pa maiisip yun kung mas importante sakin ang kalagayan ni Mama? Plano ko na nga sanang huminto na lang. Hirap na kami sa pera, kaya ayoko nang dumagdag pa sa problema. Pero matigas si Mama. Pinilit niya akong magpatuloy.

Ayaw ko siyang iwanan, but I knew she was right. So, I did what I had to do. I went to the school, filled out the forms, and enrolled myself for Grade 9. It felt strange, standing there among kids talking about their summer trips, habang ako, ang naiisip ko lang ay amoy ng antiseptic at tunog ng mga machine sa ospital. I felt out of place, like I didn’t belong in that world anymore.

Mas lumala pa nung nakuha ko yung schedule ko. Iba na yung section ng mga kaibigan ko. We had planned to stick together, pero parang pati yung kaunting normalcy na inaasahan ko, nawala pa. I felt even more isolated, surrounded by unfamiliar faces who hadn’t spent their summer in a hospital room.

The first day of class came and I walked in with nervousness gripping my chest. Lahat sila, parang gaan ng buhay, parang walang bigat sa puso. Hindi tumigil ang mundo para sakin. Everyone was moving on with their lives, smiling as if walang problema. Naisip ko, halata kaya sa itsura ko na iba na ako ngayon, na buong summer kong hinarap ang laban na hindi nila maiintindihan?

But I had to push through. Mom needed me to do this, to keep moving forward.

Pagdating ng math class, the usual introductions happened, isa-isa kaming pinatayo sa harap. Our teacher, Ms. Meryjane Santos, fresh graduate daw. Maganda siya, at kahit bagong pasok, kinaya niyang magpatahimik ng maiingay sa klase. First day pa lang, nagturo na agad siya, pinaramdam sa amin na hindi magiging madali ang lesson at hindi ka papasa kung pachill-chill ka lang.

"Remember, the standard form is..." She grabbed a chalk and wrote on the blackboard:

ax² + bx + c = 0.

"Who can tell me what we call the solutions to these equations?"

Marami agad ang nagtaas ng kamay, pero ako, hindi. Hindi ko naman kasi alam ang sagot. Nagtawag si ma'am ng pangalan.

"Roots po, ma'am?" sagot ng isang babaeng hindi sigurado.

"Tama! And what formula do we use to solve for these roots?"

A boy sitting in front confidently answered, "The quadratic formula, x = \(\frac{-b \pm \sqrt{b^2 - 4ac}}{2a}\)."

"Tama! Now, I’m going to divide you into groups, and each group will solve a different quadratic equation."

Wala pa man siyang nagdedivide, mukhang decided na agad ang ibang mga estudyante kung sino ang gusto nilang makasama sa grupo. Napunta ako sa grupong magkakakilala na. Tahimik lang akong naupo sa tabi nila.

Ms. Santos handed out worksheets to each group. "You have 15 minutes. Work together and make sure everyone understands the solution. I’ll be around if you need help."