Fists over Feelings

I don't believe in God, but I believe that you're my savior

"Hi! How are you feeling today?" Sarah sat down in front of Trixie with a bright smile.

"I'm doing okay, I guess. Just been feeling overwhelmed with everything lately." Trixie shrugged as she zoned out on the cars outside the session room window.

"I'm glad you could make it today. Can you tell me more about what's been weighing on you?"

"It's mostly karate and friends. I'm worried I'm not doing enough, or that I'm letting people down." Trixie ran a hand through her hair.

"It sounds like you take on a lot of responsibility to care for others. How does that usually make you feel?" Sarah asked, clipboard and pen in hand. God, Trixie hated that clipboard so much.

"Lately, it's more like I'm running on empty. I try not to show it because I don't want to burden anyone, but I feel like I'm just waiting for something to go wrong." Trixie shrugged, "And, well, I guess it has. I lost two of my friends after switching dojo's and I feel guilty about it..."

"It sounds like you're holding yourself to high standards." Sarah smiled empathetically. It seemed like she always knew what to say, which made sense since she was a licensed therapist but it helped a lot, "Does that sound right?"

"Yeah, I guess so. I don't want to let people down or be a burden. But it's hard because I also feel like I can't keep up."

"Feeling responsible for others while also trying to carry the weight of your own emotions must be exhausting. I wonder, how do you take care of yourself in the middle of all this?"

"I don't know if I do. It feels selfish to focus on myself when others need me." Trixie sighed, "But, I guess they don't need me. I want to help because I know that if I don't, I don't know what I want."

"I hear you. But taking care of yourself isn't selfish, it's a way to recharge so that you can keep helping others without burning out. How do you think you'd feel if you permitted yourself to take a little more time for yourself?"

"I've never really thought about it like that..." Trixie bit the inside of her cheek, "With focusing on both karate and ballet, meds, and everything else, I guess I would feel less stressed. But it's hard to imagine doing that without feeling guilty."

"That makes sense. Feeling guilty is a common reaction, especially when you're used to prioritizing everyone else. But it's worth exploring ways to care for yourself and others." Sarah nodded, jotting down notes on her clipboard before suggesting, "What if you started with small steps, like setting aside 15 minutes a day just for you?"

Trixie thought momentarily before nodding with a slight smile, "I could try that. I don't know what I would do, though, besides practicing karate and ballet..."

"That's understandable. It might take time to figure out what helps you relax or recharge. Maybe it's something simple, like reading a book you enjoy, taking a short walk, or sitting quietly for a few moments. How does that sound?"

"Yeah, I think I could do that. I like reading but haven't had time for it lately. I could try to make time for it again."

"That sounds like a great start! How would it feel to start practicing that this week?" Sarah asked and Trixie nodded. "It's wonderful that you're open to trying new things. You deserve the same care and attention you give to others. How are you feeling about everything we've talked about today?"

"Just talking about it helps. And I think making time for myself might be a good step." Trixie smiled.

"I'm really glad to hear that. Remember, it's okay to take things one step at a time. You're doing the best you can, and that's enough. We can continue exploring this in our future sessions. How does that sound?"