I had a nightmare once, that I was in the hospital I just never thought it would become, a reality.
As I sat in the hospital bed with the itchy gown and no bra in nothing but the gown and my own underwear doctors rushing by, I felt uncomfortable I just wanted to go home the ER was bright and lights never turned off soon the doctor came in.
"Why are you here, you seem so young" the doctor looked at me with pity in his eyes
"I tried to kill myself" I tell him with a straight face eyes still puffing from crying
"Well why'd you do that" the male doctor asks staring me up and down but not in a creepy way, in a friendly way.
"I got sad" I begin to fiddle with the sheets of the ER bed
The doctor asked me some basic questions about when I last hurt myself then talked to my parents for about 30 minutes which felt like hours.
After what felt like an eternity the doctor came back
"72 hours you'll have to stay in a behavioral health center"
(Suicide watch)
I feel the burn in my chest as tears begin to fill my eyes.
"I just wanna go home" I whisper underneath my breath tears falling g from my eyes
"You can't yet, there's no open beds yet so you'll have to wait here until we can get you one"
The doctor leaves me in the room crying, I just wanted to go home I didn't wanna stay here I didn't wanna hurt myself I just didn't want to live anymore it didn't even work don't you think I'm being punished enough by still living but no I had to go to a mental hospital which I would end up in for a week.
