Introduction
'I'm going to study in Japan.'
'I know I know you're going anyway.'
'So you're not going to try to stop me?'
'I don't know you made your decision carefully before telling me.'
A conversation from a few months ago suddenly appeared in the mind of a young man with Thai-Japanese blood, standing on the balcony of the room. Sharp eyes stared at the numerous buildings built side by side until they were almost empty. The city with the highest cost of living in the world Tokyo, Japan.
"Yeah".
Chanon blew white smoke into the air, while holding a cigarette in one hand, his sharp eyes still looking at the glowing city. But his heart was not like that at all.
"Uh, being alone like this is not for someone like me at all."
Shin shook his head, inhaling the smoke into his lungs again, before placing the filter in the ashtray, but still not returning to the room. Both hands were still resting on the balcony railing. In his mind, he only thought about the events before he flew back to his mixed race hometown.
The day he graduated from the Faculty of Engineering, the day someone came to congratulate him with a big bouquet of flowers and a big smile, in addition to helping him carry his belongings like Shin did with the other on his graduation day. That day he told P'Oat that he was going to study abroad.
Where is not close to Thailand and is six hours away by plane.
What was P'Oat's face like that day? His gentle smile slowly disappeared. His eyes also began to tremble. His face was pale as if he had no blood left. But his lover kept answering that he understood. Although the sound was full of sadness.
He knew why P'Oat was scared. And why should he also be scared.
Different countries.
Different time zones.
Different societies.
Different environments.
Not everything is the same. And your heart will not remain the same either?
Worry gnawed at his heart no matter how relaxed he was. No matter how hard he tried, he still couldn't forget it. The fact that he was once tricked by his lover into flying and visiting his grandmother in Japan. In just a few months, people's hearts change. So what if it's a few years?
This is probably a rare time that a person like Chanon is afraid.
The person who opposes everyone, who doesn't seem to care about anyone, is afraid that the person from Thailand will meet someone and say goodbye, even though deep down he is convinced that that won't happen. People like P'Oat are honest to the point of stupidity, like people without brains, in love with a heart to the point of discomfort, had no way of doing so.
But things are not always as we think, right?
Cuuuuttt.
He finishes his second cigarette of the day. Then Shin lights the lighter again, watching as the flame burns red before letting it be just a small one, deftly bringing a whiff into his lungs, even though when he was in Thailand he barely touched it.
The young mixed-race man once told his best friend that he was not addicted, that he only smoked when he was stressed. However, he started smoking more when he went to Japan to study for his master's degree.
Stressed about the language? No, his Japanese is as fluent as his Thai.
Stressed out about studying? He never got along with his instructor at all.
