Challenging 12

chapter two

PATRICK

Sammy left today. The oldest by an hour and nineteen minutes, and she'd always been the glue holding us all together.

Melissa, the second oldest, was loud and boisterous, filling every room she stepped into. She argued with Lorraine constantly, each squabble echoing through the house like part of the daily routine. Lorraine was closest in age to me—though six years still felt like a gap I couldn't quite bridge. But then again, I'd always been the odd one out.

With four kids in the family, the farm was never quiet. Most days, you couldn't get a word in edgewise if you tried. There were times I didn't mind it, but sometimes, all that noise just swallowed you whole, like whatever you had to say got lost somewhere in the clatter. And now, with Sammy gone, that space seemed even bigger.

The house felt emptier without her. I wandered into the kitchen, half-expecting to find her there, apron on, whipping up something sweet. But it was just me and the quiet—only the occasional creak of the old wooden floorboards beneath my feet.

I opened the pantry, looking for something to munch on, but the shelves were stacked with boxes of cereal and jars of pickled vegetables. Nothing sounded good. I sighed, leaning against the doorframe, watching the sun filter through the window.

In the distance, I could hear Melissa and Lorraine's voices rising and falling like the wind. They were arguing about something silly again—probably who got the last piece of cake or who had the louder laugh. It made my chest tighten; their noise felt so foreign now, like it belonged to a different world. I missed Sammy's calming presence, the way she could diffuse their bickering with a simple smile or a joke.

I stepped outside, taking a deep breath of the crisp, earthy air. The farm sprawled out before me, the fields stretching endlessly, dotted with cows grazing lazily in the afternoon sun. It was beautiful, but it felt like a stage set for a play where I didn't know my lines. I grabbed my guitar from the porch, its smooth wood cool against my fingertips, and wandered toward the old oak tree at the edge of the field.

Sitting down beneath its thick branches, I strummed a few chords, letting the music spill out like a soft breeze. It was one of the few things that brought me peace—just me and the guitar, the rhythm matching the gentle rustle of leaves above. I poured my feelings into the notes, a mix of sadness and frustration, hoping that with each pluck of the string, I could push the loneliness away, even just a little.

As I played, I found myself thinking about Sammy, about how she always knew when I needed space and when I needed her to just be there. She had a way of making everything feel okay, and now I was left trying to navigate the noise of my other sisters on my own.

After a while, I looked up and saw a figure in the distance—a girl with blonde hair, standing at the edge of the trees. My heart jumped. I knew it was Lexie. She looked curious, a little hesitant, but there was a spark in her eyes that made me want to smile.

"Hey!" she called, her voice bright and cheerful, cutting through the quiet like a sunbeam. "What are you doing out here?"

I set my guitar aside, a sudden warmth blooming in my chest. "Just playing," I replied, feeling the weight of my earlier thoughts lift a bit. "Wanna join?"

Her face lit up as she bounded over, and for a moment, the heaviness in my heart felt lighter. Maybe having a new friend to share the quiet with would help fill the space Sammy left behind.

Lexie was my girlfriend. We'd been dating for four months now, scince she first came to cork with her older brother johnny, and even at ten years old, it felt like something special. She was pretty, her brown hair shining in the sunlight, and I couldn't help but think she was prettier than all my sisters. With her around, everything felt more peaceful.

"Sure!" she said, sitting down next to me, her smile making me feel warm inside. "What are you playing?"

I shrugged, a bit shy. "Just some chords. Nothing special."

She leaned in closer, her blue eyes sparkling with curiosity. "Play something! I can sing if you want."

"Really? You can sing?" I asked, surprised.

"Yeah! I like to sing," she said, confidence blooming in her voice. "Just promise you won't laugh if I mess up."

"I promise," I said, smiling back.

I strummed a simple tune, feeling the familiar comfort of the music. Lexie's voice joined in, sweet and bright, filling the air with joy. It felt good to share this moment with her, and I couldn't help but grin.

As we played and sang together, the worries of the day melted away. I forgot about the noise of the farm and my sisters' bickering. In that moment, it was just me and Lexie, creating a little world of our own under the shade of the oak tree, where everything felt right.

I was so lucky to have Lexie. She was like a candle that never burned out, always glowing brightly, lighting up the darkest corners of my thoughts. No matter how chaotic things got at home, she was a steady presence, warm and reassuring. I wanted to be just like her—radiant and full of life, someone who could make everything better just by being there.

"Lexie," I said, my voice soft as I strummed a little quieter. "You really make everything nicer."

She looked at me, a surprised grin spreading across her face. "Really? You think so?"

"Yeah," I nodded. "I don't know what I'd do without you."

She laughed, a light, tinkling sound that danced in the air. "Well, you don't have to worry about that! I'm not going anywhere."

In that moment, I knew I wanted to keep her close. I wanted to protect her light, just like she protected mine. As we continued to play, I felt a sense of hope that maybe, just maybe, everything would be alright.

And then my dad called me in for tea. I hadn't even realized how much time had passed.

"Patrick! Time to eat!" his voice boomed from the house, breaking our little bubble. I looked at Lexie, her eyes wide with surprise as I got up.

"Guess I have to go," I said, a little reluctant to leave our secret spot.

"Okay," she replied, but she didn't move. Instead, she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, looking a bit shy.

I took a step closer, my heart racing a little. "Um, bye, Lexie."

Then, before I could think too much about it, I leaned in and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. The moment was brief, but I felt the warmth radiate from her skin, and I think I saw her cheeks flush pink.

She blinked, surprised, and I couldn't help but smile at her reaction. "See you tomorrow?" I asked, trying to sound casual, even though my stomach was doing flips.

"Definitely," she said, her voice a little breathless. I turned to head back to the house, a goofy grin plastered on my face, feeling like I had just done something brave and wonderful all at once.

The dining table was chaotic, voices overlapping and clattering dishes filling the air. Mum and Dad were trying their best to keep the peace, their eyes darting around as they attempted to manage the noise.

"Patrick lad, how's Lexie doing?" Mum asked, her voice cutting through the chatter.

"She's good," I replied, not quite meeting her gaze. I didn't really like talking, especially in large groups like this. My words felt like they got lost in the noise, swallowed up by my sisters' laughter and my parents' chatter.

But Lexie understood that about me. She was quiet too, in her own way, and she didn't mind the silences between us. Sometimes it felt nice just to sit together, sharing the comfort of each other's presence without the need for constant words.

As I poked at my food, I stole a glance at Mum. She was trying to get everyone to focus on their plates, a tired smile on her face. I could tell she was juggling a lot, just like always, and part of me wished I could help her more. But right now, I just wanted to think about Lexie and the way she made me feel when we were together.

"Are you two still playing together?" Dad chimed in, breaking my thoughts.

"Yeah," I answered, feeling a little shy again. 

The table was loud again, and I let myself get lost in my thoughts, imagining Lexie's smile and the way she lit up the world around her.