Outlaws of love: Once you own me

The Last Take

지금/jigeum/ (Now)

The room exuded a pleasant atmosphere... They finally had a day off amidst their hectic schedule, so the members decided to spend time together...

A phone call shattered the momentary peace, drawing anxious glances from the members toward the gadget resting on the sofa. They sighed in relief when they realized it belonged to Sunghoon...

"Oppa, let's end this," were the only words he heard before the call ended with beeps... Park redialed the number, again and again, only to hear, "The subscriber is temporarily unavailable" 

It felt as though the world had come to a standstill...

~ 전에/jeon-e/ (Before)

My pain is mine alone. It never interested anyone, and it never will. It stays with me, colouring my dull loneliness; my pain has always been by my side.

Inaction. Indifference. Loss. Sorrow. Determination. Hatred. Possibility. Happiness. Extinction. The world is filled with countless emotional palettes, some warming the heart, others breaking the spirit, sometimes even tearing the wings from their roots, leaving no hope. Life is full of ups and downs; it isn't fair. Some may be favoured, while others dwell at the bottom. In the eyes of others, he was perhaps seen as someone from the upper echelon, born with a golden spoon adorned with precious stones, presented on a silver platter with a royal blue silk bow from the very first days of his existence. Yet, he never felt like that; within him, the flower of loneliness burned bright. His parents demanded nothing less than first place in studies, a coach requiring flawless performances (though more like an older sister), and tutors insisting on perfect comprehension of foreign languages he was forced to learn. When he expressed his desire to become an idol, his father reacted much like his mother did when pushing him into figure skating, with stern disapproval. His mother, with a look of reproach, wanted him to continue what was started and, in turn, their legacy. Although her view differed slightly from his father's, she waved it off, avoiding the topic whenever possible without protest, knowing it was the first time her son showed genuine interest in something on his own. She chose to remain neutral, offering silent support. The only person who truly stood by him was his younger sister, who despite her young age, wanted to help her brother in any way she could. He had to balance figure skating training for upcoming competitions, studies, and tutoring sessions. At any moment, his ranking could fall, and only the first place was acceptable in his family. This added to the daily grind of a trainee. They demanded perfection, but the challenge was that he was merely a person striving for his ideal self, the "me" he would be proud of. He thought he might go mad with all the tutoring, exams, and training, be it for figure skating or as a trainee, or the languages. The boys he trained with thought he was cold and uncommunicative. Only Jay got to know him better from the start, as his situation was similar, except his parents were normal. Eventually, Heeseung and Jungwon joined in. Heeseung initiated contact, having seen his performance, and they started talking. With Jungwon, their bond formed almost unnoticed, possibly because he and Yeji shared similar views on things, not to mention they were of the same age, making it strange that he didn't resonate with Yang. Then came the hiatus in the form of a survival show. He continued to lose his sanity but for entirely different reasons. Now, five years had passed since his debut with the others. Life never stood still; it kept moving forward, and he felt an increasing sense of lagging. A fierce burning sensation settled in his chest as if his lungs were on fire. It seemed he no longer had the strength; he couldn't keep up with time and life. He was good at many things, but expressing his feelings was not one of them; he had to learn this from scratch, having suppressed them all his life.

Sunghoon sat silently, unfocused, his thoughts far from their lovely dormitory. He watched his members rush joyfully around the apartment, packing their suitcases. Soon they would board a flight, at four in the morning. The hands of the watch, part of his beloved collection, showed ten in the evening. They were about to embark on a unique vacation intertwined with filming, but he would only fly out the next day, unlike the rest, as he still had work in Seoul as a budding actor. He needed to complete a few scenes and an interview before he could leave with peace of mind. All their other important events were already filmed. However, during the shoot, he would...