I Can't Say [Original]

Background, Prologue and a Disclaimer

Disclaimer:
There will be things mentioned in this story that are really bad and might sound really fucked up but are accounts into my mind and experiences. I will put an [M] in the title if it's a chapter that is strong or possibly triggering to people. Here are other indicators to look out for.

[M] - Mature (Sexual)

[S] - Sexuality (lgbtqia+, slurs targeted against the narrator, or gender dysmorphia)

[SH] - Self harm or things to do with mental health/mentality and suicide.

[SA] -  Sexual Assault

[H] - Harassment (Any type)

[G] - Graphic

[B]- Body dysmorphia, Eating disorders, hating your body, etc.

I'll update more indicators when writing more.

Background:
If you were to ask me why I'm writing this I would tell you I don't really know why. I'm writing this off of the pure impact of what goes around in my head. Some of it is twisted indeed and my comfort the disturbed and disturbed the comforted but what it may include will alter what you think because of human nature to relate to what they conceal deep inside. Some of the things in here will harm the names of others who know they have done wrong but never wished to properly apologize. This is the story of my life not in explicit detail, but clips and pieces that I wished to convey, the story of my mind, the one who wished to be heard, the one telling stories about how they feel at least to get it off their mind.

You will experience this story as if you were in my mind pleading and wondering if someone could see the light in your eyes fading as you become more and more of what you wished you weren't. The names mentioned are true to those who I've encountered in life and who I wished to mention because if ever read, should know what they meant, at least to me, in the depths of what I call my mind, a place to escape time. If this story changes how you perceive me as a person, then shall it be. I don't need to fit into your perception of me as this is the account of my mind and my mind only. Not the physical description that you see, the one that I change to fit into what I want others to see. No, this is the real part of me. At least the one stuck in their mind.

Prologue:
Have you wondered if you were the universe what secrets others would find out about you? The secrets or feelings that you're too scared to tell others because they're either so messed up that you'll be sent to the places your parents watch on TV that make them feel disturbed? Or feel as if the world or generation is downgrading? Or the feelings you're too scared to tell others because you know they just wouldn't care? Or worse, they just ignore it because they can't help you?

You indeed have.