Before I start my first vent, here's a summary of what happened every month in 2024 that I've experienced (so far)
January:
Me and my old friend (male) kept having small arguments over the littlest of things that slowly made us distance ourselves from each other
Slap in the face over some small mess..THAT'S EASY TO CLEAN UP AND THINKS I'M LYING (mom)
Detention for being late 3 days in a row
February:
Lost contact with my friends entirely
Got some accomplishments (church)
March/April:
Nth much rlly happened just me being alone and feeling lonely at school
May/June:
same as march/april
July:
started to feel lonely since all my online friends weren't talking to me
August (the start of the doom):
Started feeling extremely tired
Didn't feel like doing anything
parents started calling me 'lazy' and a 'nuisance'
insecurities grew on me again (I was insecure abt my weight and looks when I was a kid, but I grew out of them a lil bit, but they're back..again)
arguments between family rose
crying at night almost everyday
started self-harm (not cutting but it still counts)
(end of august) met some lovely online friends that I'm still with to this day ^^
September:
high school started
stuck in this repetitive cycle of loneliness everyday due to lack of friends
started getting more stressed, overwhelmed, and anxious.
Feeling miserable
Always wanted to sleep
Started listening to music to escape reality
October:
oh boy..
Loneliness started to hurt more
Always tired
Arguments rose (between my mom)
stressed/overwhelmed due to the high expectations for my grades
Started having mood swings
Never felt truly happy
Started to wish I was somebody else
Started comparing me to other ppl
Hated myself
Feeling numb/overwhelmed with emotions
November (so far!):
Almost got kicked out of the house for a night (bc I didn't feel like exercising for the second day in a row and wanted to take a nap, got into an argument)
Still hate myself
attempting to be more productive
conflicts between my mom and I kinda affected the way we talk to each other now (can't tell if that's mommy issues or not since I don't wanna self-diagnose myself over the littlest of shit)
Paying little attention in class
Always listening to music
That's all! Feel free to vent here, it's a safe place! ^^
Love ya <3
YOU ARE READING
Venting (cause why not)
RastgeleWelcome to my venting book! U don't have to read, it's actually pretty pointless if u do, it's just me talking abt my issues, what im struggling with, etc etc. Also I can't promise u that I'm not going to delete the book Enjoy!
