You Could Be A Ghost For All I Care

Stiles stood under a street light outside Derek's loft. He watched as his shadow swayed when he did. He didn't know why he was here, it wasn't helping with him not going into a panic attack. He could see through the big windows to Derek's loft & nothing moved. It was completely still. Only proving more that Derek was in fact gone. Stiles took a few labored breaths, trying to calm himself. 

He looked back down at his shadow, but this time there was another shadow next to his. Just from the shape of it Stiles could tell it was Derek's, but he didn't allow himself to turn around. Because Derek was dead & Stiles was losing his mind, & he wasn't going to allow his mind to control him like that. He held back a whimper as the shadow moved closer. Stiles could swear he heard the foot steps to go with it, but he didn't let himself have the hope. 

"Stiles." He brought a hand up to his hair & pulled at it, trying to not completely freak out. "Stiles, turn around." 

"No." 

"Why not?" 

"Because you're dead. You're just a figment of my imagination. And if I turn around I'm going to have hope you'll be there when I do, but you won't be. Cause you're not real & I can't go through that." 

Stiles could feel phantom Derek's breath on his neck, & it sent chills down his spine. 

"Stiles, please look at me." Stiles took a deep breath. 

"If I do, you have to promise to be there. You can be a figment of my imagination or a ghost or whatever. I can even handle being the only to ever see you, but you have to be there & you have to promise to stay. I can't have hope & then lose you. Just.. promise me." 

"I promise." 

Stiles took another breath before slowly turning. He almost completely lost it when he saw Derek actually standing there. He was looking at Stiles with a small smile, but there was blood on his shirt & it was all ripped up. Stiles put out a shaky hand & slowly placed it to Derek's chest. 

He was there, he was actually there. Stiles brought his other hand to Derek's cheek, rubbing his thumb over Derek's stubbly chin. Stiles couldn't decide whether his imagination was actually crazy enough for this to happen or if Derek was actually there. 

"You.. You're not dead?" Derek shook his head & brought his hands up to rest over Stiles'. 

"I'm here." Stiles let out a shaky breath & rested his head against Derek's chest. 

"Everyone thought you were gone. Scott said.. I .. God I thought I lost you." 

"I'm not going anywhere, I promise." Stiles removed his hands from where he had them & wrapped his arms around Derek's neck. 

"I thought you died & I didn't even get a chance to tell you.." Stiles stopped, realizing he almost said that out loud. 

"Tell me what?" Stiles didn't answer, just squeezed his eyes shut & tightened his grip on Derek. 

"Stiles, tell me what?" Stiles sighed. There was no getting out of this one. 

"I thought you died & I didn't get a chance to tell you that I love you." Derek didn't say anything for a minute & Stiles just clung to him tighter. He wasn't completely positive he wasn't just going insane & didn't want to risk the chance of letting go & Derek disappearing. 

"You love me?" 

Stiles sighed. "Yes."

 Derek laughed. Stiles pulled back to look at his face, but still not letting go of him. 

"Why are you laughing? This is not a laughing matter. I thought you were dead & I'm still not sure if I'm not imagining you. Then I tell you I'm in love with you & you laugh, it's not funny." 

Derek smiled at him fondly. Stiles was about to continue his rant when Derek pressed his lips to his. Stiles squeaked in surprise, making Derek laugh into the kiss. Stiles quickly got with the program though, & started to move his lips with Derek's. Derek smiled & put his hands on Stiles' hips. After what felt like forever they parted, both smiling. 

"Believe you're not imagining me now?" 

"Not at all, I think I need more evidence." Derek laughed & brought their lips back together. 

"Now?" 

"We're getting there." Derek laughed again, running his thumb over Stiles' cheek. 

"What am I going to do with you?" 

"Love me, feed me, & never leave me." 

"Well I got the first part down, we can work on the rest." Stiles smiled at him. 

"Was that your stealthy way of saying you love me?" 

"Absolutely." Stiles laughed & rested his head on Derek's shoulder. 

"I'm not kidding though, you're never allowed to leave me ever again. You're not allowed out of my sight, & there will be no fights or deaths. Only safety & hugs & aliveness. Ok?" 

Derek laughed & kissed Stiles head. 

"Whatever you say."