The Art of Failing Up

Beyond Comparison

In a world constantly filled with comparisons, it’s hard not to measure our own progress against those around us. Social media, academic achievements, career milestones—everywhere we look, there seems to be someone who is doing it better, faster, or more successfully. For many of us, this fosters an endless cycle of self-doubt, where we feel like we are always lagging behind, outpaced by peers who seem to have everything figured out. The constant urge to compare ourselves to others can be overwhelming, especially when we feel as though we’re falling short of some invisible standard. But what if the key to true peace isn’t in measuring up to others, but in embracing our own individual journey, at our own pace?

I struggled with this for a long time, especially during my college years. As a second-year student, I often found myself comparing my academic progress to that of my classmates. Some seemed to glide through their exams with ease, while I struggled to keep up. Others were involved in numerous extracurricular activities and landing prestigious internships, while I felt like I was stuck, spinning my wheels in place. The more I compared myself to them, the more I felt like I was falling behind. I questioned my abilities, wondering why I couldn’t keep up, why I wasn’t as successful, and why my progress seemed so slow in comparison.

But over time, I began to realize something important: everyone’s journey is different. The path that works for one person may not work for another. And comparing my journey to theirs was only draining my energy and robbing me of the joy of my own growth. I was allowing my worth to be defined by others’ expectations and achievements, rather than recognizing that my value was rooted in my own unique experiences, struggles, and progress.

Releasing the urge to compare myself to others wasn’t easy. It required a conscious effort to shift my focus from external standards to internal ones. Instead of measuring myself against the success of my peers, I started to focus on my own personal growth. What had I accomplished, no matter how small? What challenges had I overcome that made me stronger? How had I improved since the last semester, the last year, the last milestone? Slowly, I began to see that the real measure of success wasn’t how I stacked up against others—it was how far I had come on my own journey.

What helped me the most in this process was learning to embrace my own pace. Some people might rush ahead in life, achieving things quickly, while others might take longer to reach certain goals. But the pace at which we move doesn’t diminish the value of our accomplishments. Success isn’t a race; it’s a personal journey, and it doesn’t matter how quickly we get there, as long as we continue moving forward. It’s about progress, not perfection. It’s about acknowledging where we are in the moment and understanding that we’re exactly where we need to be.

I also learned that it’s okay to not have everything figured out. We live in a world that often glorifies achievement and success, creating a pressure to constantly be moving forward at a rapid pace. But what if success wasn’t just about speed or external recognition? What if it was about finding fulfillment in the present moment and honoring our own personal growth, no matter how long it takes?

It’s essential to recognize that comparing ourselves to others only serves to undermine our own worth. We all have different timelines, different struggles, and different paths to follow. The only person we should compare ourselves to is the version of us we were yesterday. It’s not about being better than someone else; it’s about being better than you were, embracing your unique journey, and taking pride in your individual accomplishments.

As I stopped comparing myself to others, I began to see my own value more clearly. I realized that my worth wasn’t tied to how much I achieved in comparison to others, but to my ability to continue learning, growing, and striving, even in the face of setbacks. My worth was defined by my resilience, my authenticity, and my willingness to keep moving forward, regardless of how quickly or slowly I got there.

There’s freedom in releasing the need for comparison. It’s a liberation that allows us to embrace our unique journey, without the weight of other people’s expectations. It’s about understanding that success is not a one-size-fits-all concept. What works for someone else may not work for you, and that’s okay. The beauty of life lies in its diversity, in the endless possibilities for growth, and in the recognition that your journey is just as valuable as anyone else’s, even if it looks different.

In the end, learning to let go of comparisons has been one of the most freeing experiences of my life. It’s allowed me to focus on what truly matters—my own growth, my own path, and my own progress. The next time I feel the urge to compare myself to others, I remind myself that my worth is not measured by their achievements, but by my own.

Your journey is yours alone, and the only comparison worth making is with the person you were yesterday.