Introduction : Chap 1

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"Click" the sound my Glock made as I cleaned it out before putting my bullets back in it.
Growing up where I'm from it's better to be safe than sorry.

"At sixteen I got my GED never saw a prom ; I been weak and I been strong I been through the fire I been through the storm I try to do right and I know I do wrong just be happy for me when my life is gone" I said boldly as I rapped along to Amil's verse. A song that strongly aligned with me.

"I look so good, how did they ever put me down?" I questioned more so as a statement as I starred into my mirror. Something I found myself doing often ever since a little girl.

Walking out of my busted bathroom into my room. Filled with mostly black and grey clothes occupied my bed and parts of my floor.

Lately I've been going through it bad often catching myself crying in the dark or having a panic attack, all results of stress.

My twin brother shortly appeared in my doorway giving me a look of irritation.

"Why the fuck do you insist on riding through the hood with that rat ass bitch" Breylen spoke with anger and vain laced in his voice.

"First of all hoe watch yo mouth she not a rat and don't call her a bitch. Second of all we went to ONE party get over it. I barely leave the house as is." I spit back hoping he would try me so I could knock his head in between my wall and dresser.

"Whatever. Stop riding with her before you get yo ass hurt. That bitch stay in some drama and I'll be damned if I lose my only sister my twin at that all because a bitch don't know how to stay out of nigga shit. You gone keep fucking around and find out. That shit affects ME more than any of them." He angrily said back before he slammed my door leaving.

That made me feel bad and I began to tear up, because as rude as it is he was right. We only had each other and I never thought of it that way. We was each others only family that we had left outside of our cousin.

Our parents died a year ago and to say life was hard was an understatement. My brother was taking it hard barely at home doing God knows what to keep a roof over our head and pay the light bill. He wanted me to focus on my long term goals and stacking my money.

So far I had about $3000 saved, hoping to soon buy a car.

The checks from tropical smoothie wasn't a lot but it'll do until I figure out a game plan.

Brushing the wave of sadness that started to fully wash over me I got up grabbing my phone and purse before walking out my room leaving with hopes to stop myself from becoming depressed again. Something I've recently realized will forever be a thing with me.

"Hey Ari can I come over? Me and Len got into an argument...again" I said sadly but nervously.

"Yea that'll be nice thank you Okay thanks see you soon" I said into the phone agreeing to letting her pick me up seeing it was 7pm already in November so busses running time was iffy.

I sat on my spring loose couch waiting for ari to come get me. She stayed about 25 minutes away from me in the suburbs while my "home"sat almost directly in the middle of the hood.

It wasn't hood niggas or nothing all outside of my house like some places but it was still a bad neighborhood. I stayed on one of the quietest blocks though filled with children and elders thankfully.


"Hey girl thank you" I said as I got into Ari's car. Someone was in the front seat so I was in the backseat just thankful to be able to see good energy and smiles.

"Hey sis and girl you know I got you. This my...friend kel " she said smiling at me before driving off

I quickly made note at the way she said "...my friend"

"Hi I'm Bre" I said sending a small smile and wave his way.

"What up shawty" he said sending me a nod and turning back around.

I sat in the back scrolling on ig before we arrived at what I'm assuming is kel house?

"Okay so kel is throwing a small "Friendsgiving" so I can either drop you off at my house or you can sit with me we ain't gotta stay long if you don't want to, Kell people's cool tho" she said reassuring me making sure I didn't feel pressured. The same thing she always did that Len was clearly oblivious to.

"Hm okay I can stay I don't want you to have to drop Me off and drive all the way back" I said after thinking, I was thankful she picked me up so I would never make her have to change her plans unless necessary.

We got out the car collectively before kel opened his door for us.

"Wassup bro we been waiting on yo bum ass " one of his I'm assuming friends said before walking up and dapping him Up like a typical hood nigga.

I'm so glad I had an errand to run earlier cuz usually I would be in jogging pants and a tee shirt. Not really caring as long as I'm comfortable

Everyone here looked like they had a nice amount of money. Atleast enough to miss a week worth of work. Where as I looked somewhat "up to part".

"Wassup shawty, hey Ari"
This random ass guy spoke after dapping kel up.

"Hi" I shyly spoke.
I was a People's person but i definitely was shy as well especially with all the unfamiliar faces.

His home was in a nice part of the city About 10-15 minutes away from me. His home sat nicely with bushes and pathway lights leading up to his home. In the inside sat an extra long grey sectional and a big dinning room table. Fold up chairs scattered the room as it was more than 10 guest here.

I kinda felt out of place seeing the newly remodeled looking home filled with love and laughter. Something I was once accustomed to now seems so strange.

"Hey y'all" most of the people spoke greeting Kel, Ari and me.

I smiled and waved before I walked to an open seat.

Kel came up to me and handed me a cup of what I'm assuming is liquor before yelling over the semi loud music "see a shot take a shot shawty"

I giggled before nodding my head to show a sign of agreement than I threw the shot back. I scrunched not only my face but my body up at the sting and taste of the patron or what I assumed was patron.

Tonight was gonna be long but it was something I needed.

Some girls walked up to me introducing themselves before asking me to play uno.

I gladly accepted knowing I was about to hand they asses to them

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