A Part Of My Thoughts

Robbery

I'm changing channels on the TV trying to fall asleep, I've never had a problem sleeping before, but lately something's been bothering me, I don't think I even know what exactly. This month since I haven't worked, I feel like a different person. You will understand that feeling, the same as when you finish high school and now you stand with your papers that represent years of your life, your persistence and effort, and you don't know what to do with them. This stay at home drove me more crazy than the stressful and tiring days at the hotel. Maybe, besides everything, I was happier at work than alone with my thoughts, which worried me, but aren't we all like that?

 It was unusual for me that I no longer have the opportunity to hang out with my best friend Layla like before, of course I can't blame her, she has everything I would like to have, I'm happy for her, I just miss her, the way one sister misses another when one period of time they are not together. She lives right next door to me, but I no longer had the feeling that she lives there. That change certainly had an effect, and I had to accept it because I had no other choice. 

The earthquake that happened was not that terrible, but now I see that we should sue the architect of the hotel, because almost nothing happened to the other buildings. At the beginning I was angry, like any manager, I could not imagine a situation where we would have to give a certain amount of money for repairs, instead for other things we had planned. It's winter and Christmas is approaching. We had parties every Christmas, whoever wanted to come. Before that, dinners were always organized. It would be a suitable evening where everyone would eat in our hotel restaurant, drink wine and eat whatever they wanted, usually it was chicken or steaks.

 After dinner there would be parties in our halls, huge places where the music would be the whole night, in fact it would be as long as there were people, they would drink wine or some hot drink, they would dance and have fun like never before, there, many colleagues would cross the border friendly relationship, but I'm not allowed to talk about that, I was one of those.

 I drank more that night, although I rarely drink now, it was hard for me because I just got a new job and it seemed like everyone hated me. I always tried to have a good relationship with everyone, it worked out naturally for me, until I finished school and realized how many different people there are. 

Maya and Layla were my dearest colleagues. I was with them in our office and in addition to our work that we had to do, we loved hanging out and having fun. But before that, that night, I had to forget about everything. Everything that tormented me since my early childhood, from leaving home and losing contact with my family, was the hardest thing I had to go through in my life. 

I only talked to Jack, who was always by my side. He needed someone to rest his head on, but I couldn't do it anymore. He was far from me and that fact hit me hard, I knew that he could manage and that he would succeed in everything he wanted, but he will never know how much I miss having a family member whom I can hug without shame and pride, who would comfort me and tell me that I'm not alone, that there are people who love me, who care. 

The worst thing of all is that I work in the hotel where my father used to work. With such thoughts, I didn't pay attention to how much I drank or how much I could drink before I threw it all up. That's when I "met" Maya and Layla, I can't say I met them in the true context of that word because I wasn't sober. They came as soon as they saw me taking the tenth cup from the waitress at the bar, I don't remember what I drank that night. 

They approached and asked if I was okay and if I needed help, I don't think they even knew then that I was working with them in the same office, I raised my head and just nodded, they told me that they were going to get the car and that they would come back for me in 15 minutes, I don't know why but that idea was boring to me, who would want to go home in the middle of a party?