I want to blame Hae for making me cry straight for three days.
Why Three days you asked?
I want to finish the story in one swipe but because of my feela, I just really can't. I wanted to say Thank you again, I don't know how many times I've said it, but really, Thank you.
I felt like you just opened a door for me and for other EXO-Ls to becone this close to themm Just by reading your story. It was like a perfect piece, perfect fit.
I wanted to smile while writing this but I know my tears will just occupy my swollen cheeks and I am so tired of it happening. Oh no, don't worry. We are not mad if you had made us cry while reading, that's rare for me. You know, crying. I remember I last cry when EXO got their first Best Rookie of The Year. It was happiness. Happiness Delight.
Thank You for giving us Crushelle, MinHye, SoRa and of course the one we will forever miss, EunHa. They represent every gangirl EXO has. Seriously. From yhe simple sneaky stares, to the shrugging, to the moeeing, to the clapping like a retarded seal, to the crying, to the up's and down's, to the hiatus, and to standing back up again. You were so good.
I can't help but (Fck now I'm crying again). I wanted to tell you my feels and I'll be bodly honest on this.
At first, I loved it but I never knew I will be attached to Shin EunHa, I wanted like, to see her for real. Just one photo with the Good looking guy with big ears. I would be a complete idiot if I think of it being possible right?
At every chapter I am like. "I so love this. They were like, perfect match." I even mutter somewhat like, "Para silang magsoulmate." and then it hit me. Like what you have written, spulmates don't end up together. I almost blame myself for realizing that beforehand, It was like I almost spoiled my feels, but then again when their lovestory sneak in, I was like. It can't hurt if I hope a 'lil, right? So I did. and they became like the sweetest bestfriends on Earth, those little jealousies of our Chanyeol, to YeJin. Then, EunHa calling him names like, giant, Happy Virus, and Hapinness Delight.
That was just a fanfic, Yg. Why are you even acting like you've known Hae and eunHa for years? You're just as dumb as .. as.. lol. Haha Now, I'm scolding myself. I am so hopeless.
But noooo, I'll continue even if it hurts damned much. Because I enjoyed the story. I enjoyed waiting with EunHa in front of SM. I enjoyed meeting SoRa my beloved sasaeng, Youngjin, the chubby dongsaeng, and MinHye. When I have read that part wehn EunHa saw MinHye at the rooftop, (I've already finished Suho's) I am like. How can you do this to us, Hae. It was beyond perfect.
It explains everything. My questions on Chanyeol helping MinHye and such. Connected. Hooked. Lined. and Sinker.
And when ALL was revealed. That was when I started crying when I know for myself I shoudlld be shrugging and blushibg abd smiling with EunHa as Chanyeol whispers, Saranghae. But no, as you've said in your notes its getting harder for you. I don't even know where I got the guts of contnuing the reading. It's I myself have been torning myself to pieces. Ugh. My tears my tears, helloooooo~
I can do this. Yeong Gun, Jjang!
Just like Chanyeol and EunHa cheers themselves, right? Chamjo. I am so attached I wanted the whole world to know.
Then there came the most devastating and heartwrecking and eye-destroying and hand-trembling moments. I swear, when EunHa d-die I can't even fucking say it and here my tears again. WHY DON'T THEY JUST FICKING STOP. IT'S HELL HARD TO TYPE!! IGHHHHH
I am so tired of drying my tears with my palm. But they just won't stop.
I wanted to hug you. I wanted to see you, to let you see an EXO-L for life. I wanted you to see someone who was inspired bigtime. I even message Tao on his Weibo and Meipai. I even tried to translate your stories in Mandarin but decided against it. I mean, first I don't have the right lol, secobd , you don't know ne, third. I am a silent reader. Jeongmal Mianhamnida.
I wanted you to see an EXO-L being not just like a fangirl but like a family. We are one, always.
The video. Who didn't cry on that part? Me. Neh. I almost dried my eyes I even pincged it because I am hurting so much but my tears won't just came out. Why are they like that? When yoi don't eant them flowing, yhey come raging. But when you want them out, it felt like they're tired of rolling down too.
Minchingeo aniya?
I never felt my hands shake like that, ever in my life. I can't find my enough stength to continue but for EunHa, I will. I did. She was really an angel. From up above. From the two moons. From Him.
I even muttered, "Buo pa ang EXO dito..kade-debut pa lang nila." And I'm like on my hell-est state. What will Eunha think if she got to learn that our Chanyeol-ah cries when Kros, Luhan and Tao left. It must be harf for him. He was like stabbed four times multiplied by two. It was hell.
I suddenly felt guilty and Sorry for EunHa because our Chanyeol cried. I suddenly felt guilty and Sorry for every EXO-L. But we need to face the truth, we're hurt. Yhen that's yhe end of it. We need to support and be happy and pray for their sake still. They were EXO.
Once an EXO, always an EXO.
and when it came for the year after, I can finally breathe normally. I almkst fainted. For real. It's like I was the weakest lerson ever plus my asthma kicked in then I am all worst. But I fought. Compared to what EXO was experiencing right now, I don't have the right to complain.
I was relieved. I can finally close my attachment for EunHa, I thought so but look. Here I am, who had right EunHa numerous times. I guess, she will forever be here, *ppintsatheart* ♥
The IARWCOE was somewhat opend endes, gurae? I've read the 13 reasons and I just can supress my feels.
Thanks for bringing back EunHae. I know from the firat time I've read her name, she was not EunHae for nothing.
Wow. I never imagined myself being able to write this long, just because of a fanfic but hell. It was EXO , Chanyeol and EunHa we are talking about here. It's a passion to follow.
Hae-ah, Athuor-nim, Saranghandago. Mianhandago. Goumasupnida. ♥
Love and tears,
숭 용군 ♥
ps.
I hope I made everything clear that I really wish for your stories published. *Prays* I wanted you to know that I am anticipating a lot on SoRa and Baek, and Kyungsoo and the rest of our boys. Waiting is my middle name. :)
Mahal ka namin.
Written: 2:18 pm, 7.14.15
Manila, Philippines.
Word count: 1226
