Shattered Perfection

Thirty

Vivian sat on the edge of the bed and pulled a tissue from her pocket.

'Oh my darling, what have you got to be sorry for?' she asked.

Siobhan was hiccupping from distress. 'I put you and Jamie in danger, that's unforgivable and you should hate me.' She covered her face with her free hand. Vivian watched the woman cry realising how guilty she must be feeling.

'Siobhan,' she said firmly. Using Siobhan's name cut through her tears. Vivian pulled her hand from her face and wiped her tears gently. 'I need you to hear me. I do not blame you for what happened, you are not at fault. I am sorry that you suffered more at their hands. You do not deserve that. I could never hate you.' Viv cupped her face gently aware of how sore it was. Siobhan had been looking away, unable to make eye contact. 'Bon bon, look at me.' Viv said firmly.

It took some time but eventually Siobhan looked into Viv's eyes. 'My love, I can't tell you how relieved I am to know you are safe, I was frantic when I learnt they had taken you. I care about you Bon.' Viv blushed as she said it. Siobhan looked at their joined hands which were resting in her lap.

'I care about you too Viv,' she whispered. 'How, um, how is Jamie?' she asked falteringly, worried that he had been upset by yesterday's meeting with Janice.

'Fine,' Viv responded, 'totally fine, eating breakfast and tormenting Autumn and Winter at the moment. Sorscha and Carly were amazing last night, he didn't even know about Janice.' At the sound of her colleagues names Siobhan looked away guilt blossoming again. Vivian noticed the change in her body language. 'Hey, hey, what's up? Where did you go?' She used her free hand to gently turn Siobhan's face back to her own.

'I hurt the others, I brought this to their door. Sorscha and Reece were hurt because of me. I can't forgive myself.' Siobhan whispered.

'Well Siobhan Serpent, that's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard!' Vivian said with a smirk. 'Did you hit them?' she asked.

'No.' replied Siobhan quietly.

'Did you force Janice to go off the deep end and try and hurt Jamie?'

'No'

'Did you ask Roger to be an abusive, drug dealing low life?'

'No.' The corner of Siobhan's mouth lifted slightly.

'Then stop beating yourself up, you're already pretty battered.' Vivian finished grinning. 'Now, she said seriously. 'You need rest and peace, I'll be here if you need anything but I want you to lie down and try and sleep.' Siobhan nodded, wincing as she shuffled down the bed, she rested her aching head on the cool pillow and closed her eyes. Vivian sat next to her for the next hour as she slept. She didn't remove her hand. Marjorie had sent her a text letting her know the police had interviewed Reece and Sorscha and had let them both go home. Charlotte had taken Mia home too and put her to bed after the police had taken her statement too.

Siobhan woke slowly, becoming aware of the noises of the hospital, the voices of nurses, doctors and other patients. She ached something rotten but her hand felt warm. Turning her head lightly she saw Viv's hand clasped in her own. Her eyes followed Viv's arm up to her face. Viv's head had lolled to the side, her dark hair was covering one side of her face. But on the side, she could see her eye was closed and she was breathing softly. Siobhan smiled to herself a little. She felt safe. She tried to reposition herself on the bed and groaned when pain flared through her. Vivian's eye snapped open.

'You ok Bon bon,' she asked, rubbing the back of her hand.

'Please could I have some painkillers?' Siobhan asked. Vivian agreed and went to find a member of staff. While lay there alone, Siobhan thought of what had happened. Both Roger and Janice were in police custody and she was alive, it was more than she thought possible especially when she was in that room yesterday with an enraged Roger. Thinking about him didn't give her the same shiver of fright as it had once did. Perhaps she could get braver? She had become angry in the room when Roger was hitting her. She saw him for the pathetic man he was, desperate for power and money.

Vivian returned with a nurse who administered some pain relief through the canula in the back of her hand.

'You're going for your scan in a moment,' the young woman said before bustling away.

Siobhan nodded as the pain killer washed over her body like a warm cloth. She didn't know what they'd given her but it was good.

'That was morphine,' Vivian said sitting gently on the bed next to her. 'Has it helped?' her face was concerned. Siobhan smiled at her.

'Yes it has.' Her open eye was more glassy than it was before. She felt floaty and her face had lost the pinched looked Viv had come to know came with pain for Siobhan.

'I can see,' she laughed.

'Viv, thank you for being here.' Siobhan began. Viv shook her head.

'Of course I'd be here, I didn't want to leave before but Jamie needed me.'

'I know,' responded Siobhan, 'and he must always come first.' Vivian nodded in agreement.

'But you Bon bon, are important to me too.' Viv said leaning down and kissing her forehead. Siobhan's eyes closed, breathing in Viv's scent.

'I want to be at home with you.' Siobhan muttered not realising she'd said that out loud.

'We'll go home as soon as we can.' Reassured Vivian. Siobhan blushed.

Just then a porter came to take her for the scan. 'I'll be here when you're done.' Vivian told Siobhan, who nodded worriedly as she was wheeled away.